The power of affirmations
If you harness the power of affirmations then within a month or two you will see yourself improve, sometimes drastically, in any chosen area.
People that are overweight and use effective affirmations like the ones I’ll show you here, lose incredible amounts of weight.
People with horrible social anxiety that are scared to ask for directions from people begin to crawl out of their shell with affirmations, and work hard till they become likable!
And if you are like most people than you also worry sometimes about what people think of you, it’s perfectly normal. But maybe if you use affirmations with some other recommendations that I’ll give you later, you will be able to live a life of “complete social freedom”!!!
If you really stay consistent with affirmations and follow through with action I can 100% guarantee you that in 3 months you will be a new person and feel a ton of self gratitude for doing the work.
Don’t be that guy that feels regret in 3 months, never mind at the end of your life.
Listen, I am not saying that your life will be totally transformed, but I am saying that you will see significant improvements to your life and from that place you will be able to make long term choices to make real deep transformations.
You gotta think long term….
(Most people use affirmations for social life, and since I focus on the dating world to men I’ll use that as our example.)
If you and I want to use affirmations to build our likability and overall attractiveness to women we first need to learn how any affirmation works in the first place and then reverse engineer to impact ourselves.
Your mind works on associations of pain and pleasure.
For instance, when you were 3 years old you had not yet learnt that stove tops are hot, but one day you got up and touched the stove top and instantly got massive pain.
Now your brain associated big pain to stove tops and that way you won’t do it again.
This is called an association.
“Associations” associate pain or pleasure to anything.
Let’s say you see an incredible hot girl your age crossing the street, will go talk to her? Or maybe give her a compliment? If your the average guy out there probably not…
Why? This is a perfect chance to meet a super hot girl? Maybe she will be your girlfriend, you’ll be able to attract more women into your life! Look at all the pleasure you might get?
Your brain made a simple prediction to assess the potential pain and pleasure based on your past associations and since your brain associated too much pain – it stopped you.
But where did you painful association come from?
A very simple example: once while you were young, you got rejected by your parents and it was incredibly painful.
From that day on you associated massive sadness and pain to rejection.
This made you close up to love because you always fear that your partner might also reject you and most importantly from then on you began to fear approaching new girls…
But you and I can reverse this process to our advantage so that now you can easily go out and talk to all the women you want with cool, core confidence.
How? Use affirmations to associate more pain than pleasure if you don’t go talk to her.
For some people doing affirmation the mainstream way works, or you can do these simple upgrades to your affirmations to make them at least 500% more effective.
The way mainstream self-development books teach affirmations is simple.
- Look in the mirror
- Say the affirmation “I am beautiful and smart”
- Try to have as much as emotion as possible
But I am going to teach you how to hack this process.
Hack number one: build affirmations that reflect your actual level.
This is soooooo crucial, gosh!
If you have a social anxiety don’t say “I am the super charismatic and attract any woman that I want.”
If I had said this to myself while I had my social problems my brain would have started to laugh at me…
What you need is to start small, say something like “being lonely is horrible compared to getting rejected and I enjoy going out to meet people” and that way you brain will start to change and you will feel it!
So get your affirmations to your level.
And as you take action and keep on saying your affirmations you’ll be able to take them to the next levels about attracting women and whatever else you want.
You can also try saying: “I am becoming a man that is attractive to women and ____”
The secret word is “becoming” because this makes the brain more acceptable to this affirmations and not outright ridiculous.
But if this also seems too much for your mind to believe than swap that out for something like “I am on my way to become…”
The second step: say “I am not” affirmations.
Your mind will do anything to make sure you act within your self-image.
One of the greatest pains that your brain will do anything to escape is not acting consistently to your self-image.
So change your self-image using negative affirmations, meaning “I am not affirmations.”
I was once working with someone that had been called crazy, retarded, and uncontrollable his entire childhood.
Very sad, and his mind found a way to act crazy in every social interaction and in turn nobody liked him, which in turn made him think that he could never make friends.
And I worked with him starting with affirmations and he said this every morning
I am not crazy
I am not insane
I am not uncontrollable
And other affirmations like that.
Notice that I never told him to say “I am ____” affirmations, I told him to say “I am not ____” affirmations.
He needed to have some sort of confidence while saying affirmations, and saying “I can make friends” would never have worked, so I worked with him to clean out the garbage first.
So getting back to what we were saying, use “I am not ___” affirmations to change your self-image and you will act automatically within your new cleaned out self-image. (By the way, you can also do really simple “I am ____” affirmations like “I am human” to clear out some garbage.)
This is incredibly powerful if you really understand what I’m saying here.
Saying these types of affirmations will both give the emotion to make any affirmation effective, but also it will transform your self-image which is really the key to any growth.
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Step 3: Move your body and get yourself in a powerful state.
Remember that you are creating associations — associating pleasure to social situations, but if you don’t feel pleasure while saying affirmations then your affirmations will be useless.
Maybe listen to your favorite music and then say your affirmations.
Another popular way is to move your body in a way that makes you feel good, studies show that people how simply smile or even just stand straight with good posture for 2 minutes feel significantly better.
So hack your mind and make this a habit to before every affirmation.
Some people do both, they dance to music, do whatever works for as long as you feel good.
Step 4 – prove the affirmation true
This is one of the most important hacks I have ever learned.
Don’t just say I am this person, tell yourself how you know.
Let’s say you are trying to tell yourself that you are likable, you can say I am likable, but you can can make a serious upgrade to that by adding: “I am likable because when I spoke to sally yesterday see seemed happy to see me and had a real smile when she saw me.”
And let’s say you are taking the “I am on my way to becoming likable” approach, then simple…
All you need to add is “I am on my way to becoming likable because a year ago I had zero friends, and then 6 months ago I started to get over my social anxiety and now I can do some small talk with some rather attractive girls, that means in 2 years I will be really likable.”
You can make a story out of it. Whatever floats your boat.
Now isn’t this a waaaaay more powerful affirmation, unlike just saying “I am beautiful” – I mean after reading my suggested add on, doesn’t “I am beautiful” just sound like a load of crap?
Or for the guys is business say: “I am on my way to generate X amount of dollars a year and I know I can do that because 2 years ago I was dead broke and year after that I was able to rent my own apartment, buy my own food and support myself and now I am doing quite fine, so it’s very logical to believe that I’ll be able to earn X amount of dollars a year.”
You could also add a date, for example, “in 2 years I will be earning X amount of dollars a year because…” it all really depends on you, I suggest going without the date because it adds too much for your brain to believe, for me, as long as you teach your brain that becoming likable is possible that’s enough for me.
Step 5: Use your imagination
Although many people use imagination and NLP techniques separately, you can use it while saying your affirmations.
If you want to lose weight than maybe see your body losing weight and becoming healthy and muscular.
Feel your body becoming leaner, “see it” as clearly as you possibly can.
If your goal is to reach a certain amount of money by a set date then see physical bills reaching you and you are full of them because of the value you provided.
There are countless studies proving the superpowers of imagination, so harness that power while saying your affirmations.
Many dating courses include visualizations and hypnosis and deeply change people psychologically. Take my favorite seduction course as an example Rise of The Phoenix By Sebastian Harris.
Step 5: Record them
After you have spent real time really coming up with good affirmations following the rules that I have outlined here, go ahead and record them so it really becomes part of your thinking.
And as Earl Nightingale said: “We become what we think about.”
So you change your thinking while listening to your voice saying your affirmations.
I will warn not to over do it and listen to your affirmations all day.
Listen to them once in the morning and that’s more than enough. Really don’t over do it, that never ends well.
By the way, saying them while looking at yourself in the mirror can help too, in the book The Magic of Believing the author recommends doing this.
- I am human
- I can improve my life because I have learnt these skills and I got good at doing this, so that means if I just put my mind to something and put in the work I will succeed.
- I am not a lost cause.
- I am on my way to becoming likable because a year ago I had zero friends, and then 6 months ago I started to get over my social anxiety and now I can do some small talk with some rather attractive girls, that means in 2 years I will be really likable.
- I can become a millionaire because this guy was dead broke, but after 3 years hie was well off and in 5 years he was a millionaire. That means that even though I am broke I can transform my life.
- I am not going to be a piss off for the rest of my life
- I am suffering now so that I can take my life to the next level and this is true because anyone that has experienced real long lasting success has gone through hell, because hell is what makes you worthy of success.
- I hate the feeling of backing down after seeing a hot girl because I know I will feel an incredible amount of regret for not at least talking to her and I know that in 3 years I will feel like an even bigger loser and even more regret because if I just spoke to one girl a day then in 3 years I would be able to date anyone and that feeling f**king sucks!
The last point that I would like to tell you is: “80% action, 20% mindwork.”
I call mindwork the work you do that involves reading books, doing affirmations, using your imagination, planning…
My rule is: only do mindwork 20% of the time, the rest of the time you need to be out there working and trying again and again.
Imagine yourself while you were 5 years old learning how to ride a bike. You didn’t go read a whole bunch of books trying to learn how to ride.
Instead you just worked hard getting better till you got there.
Same here, 80% of the time work hard and just try till you make it.
Think of the time you are doing mindword as time your spending in order to take even more action.
That’s it for now…