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Hello from wherever you're from, welcome to Dating Armory! For the guys here, I suggest you start your journey with Unlock the ScramblerWomen, start with The Devotion System. Good luck!

I learned how to approach women and get any girls number after years of being lonely from one course and one coach. These 4 steps to getting any girls number comes straight out of Sebastian’s book The Rise of The Phoenix and his course The 14 Day Seduction Boot-camp.

Trust me I would love to give you all 12 master steps, but Sebastian would sue me for giving away his stuff! But I’ll give you the 4 most important steps — as long as you take action. I’ll tell you more about Sebastian’s course later.

Before we get into this, make sure to take notes because this works! I went from being terrified of talking to girls, in 3 months getting laid with a hot girl.

Most of all, take action. You could learn from the greatest coaches in the world, but if you never take action then you just wasted your time and money! These 12 steps work as long as you work hard.

#1 Mindset: the beginning is hard

The first time I got a girls number, she had a boyfriend, but didn’t tell me. She cock blocked me. The second number that I got was from a pretty girl and she just ghosted me.

My journey came with a lot of failures, just flat out disasters.

It’s been a couple years now from that point, but I now dedicate my life to help you, to help men to get their dating life together. Think of your first approaches as going to the dentist.

It’s something you really don’t want to do. And it will hurt for a couple hours afterwards, but you must go to the dentist or the issue will just grow.

The first mindset is simply understanding that there are no 2 ways about this. The beginning will be difficult, very difficult. You can even get Sebastian’s 1-on-1 WhatsApp coaching and it is excellent, but you can never escape suffering.

I went from being a virgin, zero confidence around pretty girls to within 4 months getting super hot dates in 4 months of his WhatsApp coaching. But I didn’t get there without embarrassing myself multiple times.


You will always suffer. So accept it and move on.

That being said, build the second most important mindset is giving: You want to give her pleasure.

Ask yourself: am I approaching this girl to get sex, to get something from her? If you are, then watch yourself being needy and you know how anti-seductive that is… Your mindset must be: I am going to give you a great time! (Sexually as well, women love sex too, whoops! — that’s another core concept in his course.)

If you are coming to give them happiness, you are interested in their life, how could you have social anxiety? You are coming to offer her goodness, if she isn’t interested then you move on. You won’t have any need to get emotionally reactive to her.

You are coming to be a friend, not getting a friend. Robert Greene writes in his book, The Art of Seduction, that being stingy with your money and time is anti-seductive. You need to live of life of giving, live this mindset and watch women come to you. [1]

#2 Give a personal compliment and she will give her number

There’s a lot of guys that think giving a compliment is needy and creepy. And it’s true IF you don’t make it personal and you sound needy.

Key #1

The nerd will always sound nerdy, the confident will always sound confident. Be confident while giving the compliment and you will cut out 90% of the problem.

Here’s a great video of Cody, a very popular YouTuber, approaching girls while being awkward and confident. The results are clear, it doesn’t really matter what you say, it’s how you say it. [2]

Key #2

Give a personal compliment: I need to say this comes right out of The Rise of the Phoenix, this one key changed my dating life big time.

You can say to a girl “you’re pretty” and it sounds like you are telling her that she wants validation. No one wants to feel that they want need a compliment.

Everyone wants to feel that they are impressing you, and this is what you must convey when you compliment her. This is accomplished by making your compliment personal.

What about saying “Your dress looks amazing on you”? Wouldn’t that make her feel much better about herself? Remember our goal is to make her feel good about herself.

The key is to make compliments personal, the more personal the better. It’ll make her feel more special which is everything. She will want to go on a date with you.

If you need help coming up with compliments here’s a list of 300 compliments for your girl.

Key #3

If you really want to take this to the next level then use the power of insinuation while complimenting her. Insinuation means to hint at something. 

In the case of getting her number and possibly eventually making her your girlfriend, you insinuate/ hint at how pretty she is and let her imagination fill in the rest. 

This serves a 2 fold purpose:

  1. She feels as if she is complimenting herself which feels much better than receiving a compliment from someone else.
  2. Her imagination will take what you said and expand it, but if you simply say “you’re pretty” you don’t give her room for her imagination to fantasize what you said

Here’s a good example: “The way your dress looks on you makes me feel amazing” – notice you never say if she is pretty or not, your not even saying how you feel exactly or what about her dress is so beautiful… you will drive her imagination wild.

You have to keep in mind that you are a stranger and you just approached her so make sure to make her feel as comfortable as possible. [3]

#3: The power of assumptions

The number one thing that terrifies every man is: what do I say now?

To answer this we need to go back to what we said earlier: we are here to give, not to take. We are not here to get a friend, rather to be a friend. You only want to get her number because you have something to give her.

So now we need to re-frame the question: what do I say to make her feel good?

Answer: let her talk about her passions and interests and be super interested.

There are 2 ways to get her to talk about her passions:

  1. Make an assumption
  2. Ask her a specific question

The first way is my favorite, and this is also part of Sebastian’s course (if you haven’t got it yet, do it now!).

You assume something about her, such as “you are super fit” – this makes her need to explain why she is super fit. And she will be so happy to do that! Who doesn’t want to explain why they are so healthy and fit?

You have to make sure that you assume something good about them, not something that they are embarrassed about. Once you make an assumption, just be quiet and let them happily fill in the void.

We are trying to make the girl feel as calm as possible so that she’ll give you her number and come to the date. This is how you create an emotional connection, and throughout your journey you will learn that women are all about emotions. If you master her emotions you have mastered her. [1]

The second why is simply asking “what do you love to do with your spare time?”

And let her talk about that. As a general rule: only speak when you need to speak, give her the spotlight as much as possible. 

But both of these techniques will not work and will actually ruin your chances if you don’t actually care about her life.

You must show that you are very interested in her life. Everything in her life is fascinating. If you show that you are fascinated about everything that is going on in her life that you will have created such an emotional connection she will never leave you. You will now have a girlfriend.

Someone once said “if you want to be interesting, you have to be interested,” but I say “be fascinated and watch everyone get fascinated.”

This is the core principle of any social skill, you can’t master getting numbers and girlfriends without first learning the core principles of any conversation. How you do one thing is how you do everything. 

Remember while she is talking to be fully present and absorbed in what she is saying. She will pay you back I promise.

#4 When and how to ask for her number

You don’t want to ask her for her number, remember you are the man. This means you must be dominant. She wants to be submissive and feminine, so let her and take control of the situation.

Tell her to put her number into your phone and that you want to take her out on a first date. 

But when? There is no perfect time, you just need to go for it. This is just like going for a kiss there is no perfect time. Just go for it, that’s what makes you a man. 

Never give your number to her, always get her number from her. There are a couple other rules to follow from his course, but as long as you demand her number you should be fine. [4]

After you get her number don’t just run away, if you can take her on a insta-date. If that’s not possible then touch her as much as possible. Don’t be creepy. I mean hold her hand, give her a hug.

The goal isn’t getting the number, it’s the relationship, it’s sex, therefore you must create the emotional connection. Plus if you don’t want her to ghost you than you better make sure you create that connection.


Although I haven’t given you all the steps from the course and I can’t, but you’ve done a lot already. You’ve approached her with a powerful mindset and you feel deeply calm. She will find you instantly attractive.

Then you have given her a great personal compliment, she feels amazing about herself. She is warming up to you and she wants to know more about you 

At this point you executed a perfect assumption about her while being fascinated about her life. She goes on talking about all the wonderful things she is doing without realizing that she is falling for you head first.

Then you go for the number close, you demand her number and she submits to you. She is ready and wet for the first date. The only thing left to do is take her on a date and take her to bed.


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