16 things women look for in men and find attractive

  • Home
  • /
  • Seduction
  • /
  • 16 things women look for in men and find attractive

Welcome to the complete list of things that women look for in men and find attractive. 

These are the things that’ll arouse girls and make you be seen as the alpha male!

Lets go…

1. Men with attractive clothing

The first thing that women look for in a man is whether he seems “put together.”

To gain a woman’s attraction, you must appear respectable.

a women that finds a man attractive

Seeming respectable doesn’t mean you gotta be wearing $2000 suits, it just means that you dress like you respect yourself:

  1. Decent watch
  2. Teeth nice and bright
  3. Clean clothing
  4. Respectable shoes

For bonus points, focus on appearing masculine, find your own style of clothing that makes you stand out and feel comfortable in your own clothing.

Women look for a respectable look in men

2. Men that don’t react to insults

Girls are aroused by guys who are truly confident.

But how can a girl tell if you’re a real man or just “faking it till you make it confidence” type of guy?

The answer is simple: she “sh*t tests” you.

A “sh*t test” is when a girl will do or say something to test your level of confidence.

There are a different types of sh*t test, but the first type is when a girl insults you to see how insecure you are, for example:

  1. Wow, you’re so short!
  2. Why do you drive a 2000 dollar car?
  3. You work at a pretty stupid job

The beta male reacts to her insults by trying to justify his situation and qualify himself to her. 

He’ll say:

  1. Yeah I know I’m short, but I work out everyday
  2. I drive this piece of junk because I don’t have enough money saved up
  3. I know it’s a boring job, but it pays well

However, this is not how you want to respond. 

You want to respond in a way that allows you to maintain frame:

  1. Well I made a deal with God that reallocated those inches…
  2. Why are you in such a rush to get back to my place? My car is plenty fast!
  3. I know I’ll get back late from work, but you can always hide under my desk 

Bottom line:

Always respond to insults, never get reactive. Show her that you’re one solid piece of confidence. 

3. Men that don’t do what she wants

The next thing that girls look for in a man is the “bad boy.”

What is a bad boy and how exactly does a bad boy act?

The bad boy never fall for a “compliance sh*t test” and always maintains the IDGAF frame of mind. 

What’s an example of passing a compliance sh*t test?

  1. Not holding her purse when she asks you to
  2. Not taking random Instagram photos for her
  3. Not buying her random presents just to “keep her happy”
  4. Not waiting for her while she takes cares of things

Are you acting like an asshole? 


Do girls like it?

No, they love it!

4. Men that don’t pay attention to complaining

Another trait that gets girls interested is your ability to keep your cool while she gets all emotional, for example:

  1. Complaining about you not listening to her 
  2. Acting all sad and depressed 
  3. Being all super excited and energized

In all of these cases, she doesn’t want you to pacify her (no matter what she says), instead be her rock and allow her to melt into your frame.

Remember: normal, heterosexual girls don’t want to be intimate with another girl. 

Girls want a real man. 

A man with a sh*t load of dick energy. 

Don’t react to her petty complaining and she will love you for it.

5. Men that are already attractive to other girls 

“Girls want a guy that other girls want to f*ck and that other men want to be.”

Let’s focus on the first part: Girls want a guy that other girls want to f*ck

What does that mean and why is it true?

It’s very simple: if a girl believes that other girls feel attracted to you, it’s a sign that you’ve passed their sh*t tests and are truly masculine.

And once that girl knows you’re masculine, she’ll be automatically attracted to you.

In the dating world, this concept is better known as “pre-selection” and it’s one of the only ways to initiate instant sexual attraction. 

Now that you know what it is and why it works, here are some things to do in front of your girl to effectively use pre-selection:

  1. Talk to a girl “friend” on the phone
  2. Ask a random girl for directions
  3. Give the waitress a nice compliment 
  4. Tell her about all the girls that try to get your number
  5. Actually date multiple girls at a time (AKA “spin plates”)
  6. Tell your girl about all the fun dates you’ve been on
  7. Put on a dab of female perfume (she’ll think that you’ve just been making out with another girl)
  8. Have a bikini or a bra lying around your place 

The lesson is clear: let yourself be seen as the prize and women will fall right into your hand just trying to impress you.

6. Men that are higher socially

Women are hypergamous.

What does that mean?

It means that a woman only feels attraction to a man that is of a higher social status than her.

Women only date up, never down.

This means that from the moment a girl meets you, she’s trying to figure out where you stand socially.

So how can you show her that you’re above her socially and gain her attraction?

Well besides for passing her sh*t tests (as discussed previously), you need to focus on being seen as the leader:

  1. Other men are quiet when you talk
  2. People want to gain your approval and respect you
  3. You gain people’s trust

Use her hypergamous nature to your advantage and understand that the moment you lose social supremacy over her is the moment her desire for you disappears.

7. Men with masculine body

Here’s a list of what women look for in men physically:

  1. Tall
  2. Muscular (especially a big upper body)
  3. Beard
  4. Sharp jawline 
  5. Deep voice
  6. Rough hands

Now before you get all “blackpill” on me because you weren’t born looking like Ryan Renolds, don’t worry… neither was I.

  • You’re not tall? Start working out!
  • You’re not the best looking? Grow a nice beard!

There’s always a way to compensate for deficiencies. 

And as cliche as it sounds, confidence is really what women want. 

Looks really do help, but don’t fall into the trap that if you’re not a male model you’re not gonna get laid. [1, 2]

women find muscles very attractive

8. Men with aggressive personalities 

Women are sexually aroused by the aggressive, violent man.


Because being aggressive is a sign that you have strong genes that gives you what it takes to succeed and women want to reproduce with your genes to have children that’ll make it in this world.

Here are some ways to show violence and show your dominance:

  1. Be verbally violent
  2. Have an aggressive posture/ stance
  3. Be physically violent (whenever appropriate)
  4. Talk with power and “hold frame”
  5. Show anger

When a girl sees these alpha traits in you, she will feel incredibly aroused (especially if she’s ovulating). 

Side note:

This is only true during the “girl party years” because once a girl reaches 28-30 years old her biological alarm clock will go off forcing her to settle down with a reliable beta male and start a family. 

So if you want to have lots of sex, act in that aggressive, alpha way as mentioned.

However, if you’re looking for a long term relationship, simply become that dependable, reliable man and watch how all the older women flock towards you. [3, 4]

9. Men that are good in bed

Now just because a girl initially finds you attractive, doesn’t mean she’ll stay with you because in order to keep a woman you need to be good in bed.

So what makes a guy good in bed?

Well just like we mentioned earlier, being violent is super arousing, so unsurprisingly being violent is also what makes for super hot sex.

And although girls won’t actually admit it, here’s what every girls’ hindbrain desperately wants to tell you:

“F*ck me rough 

F*ck me brutal

F*ck me like a whore”

So how can you be dominant and aggressive in bed without actually hurting her?

  1. Facefuck her
  2. Pin her down
  3. Biting
  4. Scratching
  5. Smacking
  6. Telling her that she’s only good to pleasure you
  7. Light choking 
  8. Hair pulling (pull from the roots only)
  9. Bondage 

Now that you have given her everything she looks for – inside and outside the bedroom – she will maintain a high level of attraction for you and be everything you want.

10. Men that create lots of wealth

If there would be one “thing” that women find attractive in men, it would be wealth. 

Women, especially only women, want a man that can provide and protect them.

So how can you attain this cold hard cash that’ll make you attractive?

  1. Have a deep seated belief that you are worthy and capable of attaining it
  2. Be prepared to work hard (1000’s of hours)
  3. Work smart

Working smart is the most important thing to keep in mind.


Because there are 2 ways you can spend your time:

  1. Work 1000 hours as a cleaner and end up with $16,000
  2. Spend 1000 hours building an online business and end up with a passive income of $4000/ month and a net worth of $50,000.

See what I mean?

So without getting into too many details, here’s exclusive access to John Crestani’s LIVE masterclass where he teaches how to build your online empire without breaking a sweat.

And guess what?

Because you’re getting access from me, this masterclass is 100% free of charge! 

11. Men that seem mysterious

Women don’t consciously look for mystery, but every one of them subconsciously reacts to it in the most positive ways.

Here are just some of the ways to utilize mystery without being seen as too shy or boring:

  1. Hide how you feel emotionally towards her
  2. Focus the conversation on her
  3. Give mysterious compliments (you have “intense” green eyes)
  4. Reference having many friends without actually revealing details about them
  5. Replace words (i.e. yes) for body language (a nod)

Let her become an investigator to figure you out and watch how her attraction becomes a burning lust.

12. Men that are daring

Women, especially younger women, will do anything to sleep with the adrenaline junky; the guy that can’t stop living on the edge, going from adventure to adventure.


Because this type of behavior is a sign that he holds testosterone filled genes that’ll make him and his offspring survive and every girl’s hindbrain wants to mate with those kinds of genes.

13. Men with good looks

Having good looks is one of the more obvious things that women instantly notice in men.

However, I don’t want you to fall into the trap that if you don’t have model-type looks, you’ll never be seen as attractive. 

Having a good workout routine, nice clothing and a manly beard will be more than enough (especially if you’ve got basic confidence).

Either way, here’s what women look for in men in terms of good looks:

  1. Symmetrical face
  2. Noticeable chin
  3. Chiseled jawline
  4. Prominent cheekbones
  5. Hight (6’2”+)
  6. Muscular body
  7. Clear skin
  8. Forward set eyes
  9. Straight teeth

Get even some of these and you’ll be seen as attractive. Have all of these and women will approach you! [5, 6, 7]

14. Men with strong ambitions

It’s important to realize that women can sense your energy.

Women can instantly tell whether you’re interested in life or if life doesn’t mean much to you and you’re just floating around.

Do you know why this matters?

I’m sure you and it’s because women want a guy that’s gonna go after what he wants, create wealth and have an awesome life.

Ambition is a strong sign of masculinity

The great thing about ambition is that it doesn’t matter what you’re ambitious about!
You can make anything your passion:

  1. Working out
  2. Programming
  3. Building RC planes
  4. Wood working
  5. Sports
  6. Dancing 
  7. Etc.

The truth is that you can even be a little nerdy as long as you’re the confident nerd.

15. Men with a good sense of humor

Having a good sense of humor is something women want for several reasons:

  1. It’s a sign you’re smart
  2. It’s a sign your tougher (as you’ll deal with traumatic experiences better)
  3. It’s a sign that you’ll be entertaining
  4. It’s a sign that you don’t easily get offended (you can laugh it off)

What’s nice about having a good sense of humor is that you can show it off the moment you approach any girl and she’ll find you more attractive. [8]

a girl looking at a guy

16. Men that have an awesome life

Having an awesome life is really a culmination of everything we’ve talked about:

It means having:

  1. An adventurous life
  2. Money
  3. Friends
  4. Crazy sex
  5. Cool cars
  6. A super hot body 
  7. A great sense of humor 
  8. A seductive personality

The idea is that a woman will choose the man that has the life that she wants to be a part of.

So ask yourself: am I living a life that’s worth sharing with another girl?

If yes, awesome!
If not, time to get to work!

Good luck, 

Colt Smith

  • {"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}

    About the author 

    Coach Colt here, the founder of Dating Armory, your go-to source for no-nonsense, practical relationship advice. I'm a bisexual male in a same-sex open relationship and a researcher in sex, love, and relationships with 7+ years of experience. I specialize in helping both men and women navigate the crazy world of dating.

    Don't miss my other guides packed with practical dating advice (no bullshit repeated Platitudes) and tons of real life examples:

    17 Steps to Seduce Girls [& Countless Examples]

    How to Touch a Girl: 47 Smooth Techniques [Pictures Included]

    Where Can I Meet a Girl? Top 25 Venues to Meet Women Easily

    16 Useful Steps to Start a Conversation With a Girl [30+ examples]