11 Steps to Kiss a Girl if You’re a Girl

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In this step by step post you’ll learn exactly how to kiss a girl as a girl. After reading this, you’ll be able to seduce and get those sexy straight girls to kiss you!

And I totally get it: girls are so amazing, cute and adorable. Some girls are just way too beautiful and perfect! You can’t let them go without kissing them at least once and I’m here to help you with that!

But before we get started, it’s important you realize that getting any girl to kiss you is easier than you think because many scientific studies have already proven that most “straight girls” actually feel sexual desire for other girls, but have buried that lust away due to shame…

This means that your job is to simply reawaken their inner lust, guide their natural desires onto your body and feel their overpowering love for you.

My job is to teach you how to do that. Cool? Let’s get started!

1. Create the environment 

You must remember that our whole goal is to make a girl feel her inner, hidden desire to kiss you, this is why you need the right environment.

So even before you get started with the seductive procedures, you must know where the best place to kiss a girl is:

The best place is your private bedroom. 

Dim the lights, light some scented candles and serve her some alcoholic drinks – without making her drunk, of course. 

All of these factors will allow the girl to express all of her deeply repressed emotions about other girls. The key is to keep a relaxed environment where everyone feels accepted and loved.

2. Getting another girl to kiss you

Now that we’ve set up the environment, we are ready to make this girl lesbian, i.e. arouse the girl’s desire to kiss you, but how do you do that?

Lesbian porn

It’ll take some inner confidence to pull this one off, but if you feel like the girl’s OK with it, just suggest that you both watch lesbian porn together.

If that’s too much for you, ask her to read you some lesbian love/ porn stories. These may be even more powerful as it will trigger her wild imagination!

Take some of these as an example: 

  1. Literotica.com
  2. Juicysexstories.com

Use spiritual lures

In Robert Greene’s Masterpiece, The Art of Seduction, he writes:

Everyone has doubts and insecurities about their body, their self worth, their sexuality. If your seduction appeals exclusively to the physical, you will stir up these doubts and make her targets self-conscious. Instead, lured them out of their insecurities by making them focus on something sublime and spiritual: a religious experience, a lofty work of art, the occult. Play up your divine qualities; affect an air of discontent with worldly things; speak of the stars, destiny, the hidden threads that unites you and the object of the seduction. Lost in a spiritual mist, the target will feel light and uninhibited. Deepen the effect of your seduction by making the sexual culmination seem like the spiritual union of two souls. 

You don’t need to get another girl to kiss you by only using your physical lures. In fact, that can be too much for the average straight girl, it can scare her away.

Instead, talk about how lesbian love is the only pure love there is, how we all come from women and how femininity must be worshipped.

After you have successfully indoctrinated her with this ideology, every caress will feel God-like and an escape from this problem filled world.

Don’t make a big deal about it

A key principle to succeeding with gay girls is realizing that girl-on-girl action isn’t a big deal. It’s actually quite common and like we said earlier: most girls are bisexual by nature whether they admit it or not.

If you don’t make a big deal out of it, your girlfriend won’t either. Chill out, invite her over and make out.

Make her lose sexual attraction to men

Pretty simple, if she doesn’t want to kiss guys, she’ll want to kiss girls! But how do you do that!?

Simple, talk about the fights she’s had with guys, how she broke up with her ex-boyfriend and all the bad things men have done. Slowly let her realize that women are the “purer sex”…

If you are really intent on not just kissing this girl, but also keeping her as a girlfriend, take her to an abortion clinic and hear the stories of the women there. 

Most of the women there never want to be around men again, are totally traumatized and will totally convince your girl-crush that girl-on-girl is the much better option. [1]

3. Increase intimacy

As you are following the previous steps, start increasing intimacy with the girl you are with by using the power of touch.

With every caress, stroke and touch you are making the girl’s body release a hormone known as Oxytocin and whether she likes it or not, that Oxytocin will make her feel an emotional connection to you. [2, 3]

And if you caress her well, she’ll trust you, feel calm around you and even start having feelings of love for you! Keep everything sensual, stroke her hair and when she feels comfortable enough, start to cuddle with her.

At this point, if you can tell that she’s ready to kiss you, don’t wait! Turn around, sit on her lap facing her and start kissing! Just the act of showing this level of desire is enough to make any straight girl, 100% gay for life.

But if you’re not feeling “it” yet, keep escalating with step number 4:

4. Show your desire to kiss

Now that the girl is OK with you touching her, it’s time you show your desire for her. You absolutely need to make it clear that you want to kiss her because forcing your way in isn’t cool, but thankful you don’t actually need to say anything. Here are some examples:

Looking at her with desire

It’s hard to put this in words, but you know what I mean. Give her the look that she’s the only thing that matters to you.

Use your eyes to express deep desire and longing for her. Allow yourself to hold eye contact for a least a couple seconds so that she truly feels your attraction.

Looking at her lips

Do the same with your eyes, except look at her lips. Look at her lips like you’ve never seen something so tantalizing, delicious, juicy and perfect before.

Try biting your own lips while doing this so there’s no misunderstanding! Switch between looking into her eyes and her lips for best results!

5. How to tell if a girl wants to kiss you

You’ve done everything right, but you’re still not sure. After all, this is a supposedly “straight girl” and you’re not sure if she’ll reject your kiss… and there’s nothing worse than that.

So here’s how to tell 100% that a girl want to kiss you

She’s mirroring your moves

Let’s say you’re still using the power of touch to turn her on, you’re lightly brushing your leg against her leg. Is she reciprocating? 

Do you notice that she’s playing along keeping her leg in an open position for you? Is she also lightly rubbing back and forth? If yes, you’ve got a green light. If no, keep seducing and wait for a better moment.

Is she enjoying it

As you caress her and show your deep, uncontrollable desire for her, are you noticing that she’s enjoying it? Do you notice a slight smile on her face? Is she also biting her lips?

What about her eyes, do you see an inner lesbian enjoying every moment? Are you seeing that she’s enjoying your advances, if yes, you are officially ready to kiss!

6. What to say before kissing 

You don’t always have to say something before kissing, but that being said, saying the right things with the right tone will make any kiss 10 times more passionate.

Here’s how you do it:

Talk slowly

Imagine a classical seduction scene, how’s the seducer talking? Fast or slow? The seducer is obviously talking slowly and the same goes for you. 

Talking slowly shows that you are confident and deserve to be trusted. This is crucial especially if you’re dealing with a straight girl.

Compliment her

It’s super important that you tell her how beautiful and cute she is in order that she feels comfortable being vulnerable around you. 

Focus on complimenting her stunning details because that will make her fall in love with you, for example:

  1. You have the perfect hips
  2. You have the juiciest lips 
  3. I’ve never heard such a sexy voice in my life
  4. I wish I had such a perfect nose

The goal is to make her feel perfect, God-like and even immortal.

Tell her that you want to kiss

Once you’re done with that, let yourself sound a little intoxicated so you don’t sound forceful, look at her in the eye and say “we should really kiss right now.”

7. Leaning into the kiss

Now it’s time to shut up. Don’t say anything, you need to let the tension rise because you are going to lean in for the kiss.

Now unlike a guy that leans in 90% to kiss his girl, lesbian kissing calls for both girls to lean in half way in a more passive manner. 

Of course, because you are initiating the kiss, you are going to be more dominant, but generally speaking, allow her to meet you halfway before you actually start kissing.

8. Initiating the kiss

If this is your first time kissing a girl, I’d suggest you skip this step because it’ll make things unnecessarily complicated for you, but it’s still worth reading.

If you can, before your lips actually meet, kiss her neck, cheek, ear, inner arms and even her forehead. Because unlike heterosexual kissing, lesbian kissing is 1000% sesual and gentle.

The more you can build up to the climax, the better.

9. Start by kissing lightly 

If you’re used to kissing guys, this may be a very important point for you: girls kiss a lot lighter and gentler than guys do. If you are too overpowering and aggressive, your girl will pull away.[1]

Start by brushing your lips against hers moving as slowly as you can. As you feel her passion build up, you are welcome to start french kissing and moving a little faster.

But remember, going slowly is your power. The slower the better.

10. Where to place your hands while kissing 

There aren’t that many set rules in place for lesbian kissing which means you can really put your hands wherever you like while you’re making out! Just follow your instinct and base desires. But here are some easy examples:

  1. Place your hands on her cheek
  2. Use your hands to keep her hair out of your mouth!
  3. Place your hand by her lips
  4. Wrap your hands around her to pull her in

Whatever you do, be graceful and if the girl your kissing is more dominant, just follow her moves.

11. What to do after kissing

How did it feel? How was the kiss? It must have felt like something out of this world! But what do you do now that you’ve finished kissing?

  1. Tell her how much you enjoyed kissing
  2. Invite her over to your place and give her the greatest orgasm with your vibrator
  3. Keep on cuddling 
  4. Get into an even more private area and totally suck face

There are many things to do, just don’t allow you or your partner to feel any shame or guilt in regards to the kiss. Allow yourselves to celebrate it!

12. What not to do while kissing a girl as a girl

Knowing what not to do during a kiss can be just as important as knowing what to do, here are a list of things you must absolutely avoid at all costs:

  1. Keeping your eyes open while kissing 
  2. Being too aggressive 
  3. Rushing your seduction
  4. Picking the wrong environment 
  5. Having crusted/ dry lips
  6. Kissing for too long/ not taking breaks
  7. Never adjusting to your partners kissing style 

Stay away from these things and you should be fine.


Even though we’ve  discussed many points and this might seem overwhelming, kissing is not that complex!

As long as you feel confident being yourself, everything will flow just fine.

Don’t let yourself feel the pressure that every kiss has to be perfect. It’s OK to mess up, we all do! It’s only with experience that we get better. 

Your friend, 

Colt Smith 


  • Yeah I was scared to come out to my parents, but I did and I’m glad that I did.
    I can finally have a girlfriend as a girl without trying to hide it.
    It’s been a rough journey, but I’m started to re adjust. We all know kissing is just the first part!!
    Thanks again

    • Hey Daniella Smith – that is so fucking awesome!

      As a bisexual guy coming from a super religious background I know how terrifying it can be.

      I am so happy for you 🙂

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    About the author 

    Coach Colt here, the founder of Dating Armory, your go-to source for no-nonsense, practical relationship advice. I'm a bisexual male in a same-sex open relationship and a researcher in sex, love, and relationships with 7+ years of experience. I specialize in helping both men and women navigate the crazy world of dating.

    Don't miss my other guides packed with practical dating advice (no bullshit repeated Platitudes) and tons of real life examples:

    My Top 57 First Date Ideas That Always Work (As a Dating Coach)

    Are Coffee Dates Good? It (Kinda) Depends

    17 Basic Coffee Date Tips (From a Dating Coach)

    How to Get a Gay Boyfriend: 25 Tips That Work