56+ Affirmations To Attract Women: Manifest Love

Whether you want to finally get laid, get your crush to be your girlfriend, or even find your dream wife, you will soon learn how to use powerful affirmations to manifest and attract beautiful women into your life..

This 14,000+ word guide is unlike any other article you will find on the Internet.

Here's what you'll learn:

While it's not bad to learn affirmations as a single tool or how to change "specific, local beliefs," in this guide, I'm giving you the 30,000-foot view: 

I want you to finish this course knowing how to make a complete life change by arming yourself with multiple tools (including Affirmations) to reprogram your mind with a whole new self-identity, which will then go on to change many dozens of beliefs, and automatically change almost all of the actions you take in the real world. 

A new you!

Of course, this also means that you can use the tools and instructions in this guide to improve any other area of your life: money, appearance, weight loss, or spirituality.

But before we get started, let me show you how this article is organized.

Of course, you can click on any topic to skip my boring introduction (which includes my personal success story, an explanation of how affirmations work, and what results you can realistically expect).

To skip to any specific piece, check out the Table of Contents below.

Introduction Affirmations: Definition and Mechanisms 

1. Defining Affirmations And How They Work

In short, affirmations are one of the many tools used to affirm new beliefs and/or a new self-image in your subconscious mind to then automatically improve real world behaviors. 

Let's take this a step further:

I say subconscious mind because that's where all your beliefs and core self-identity are safely guarded. At this very moment, your subconscious mind controls 95% of your behavior to conform to these beliefs, whether they are beneficial or detrimental. Your conscious mind is very weak in comparison.

Without first using perfected affirmations to sneak past the "guards of your subconscious mind" and make these deep-level belief changes, any other attempt at self-improvement will seem like a forced effort by the relatively weak conscious mind, and likely temporary as the subconscious mind reclaims its territory. 

Didn't you formulate your affirmations well? The guardians of your subconscious mind will recognize this as an attack, and you'll have an even harder time with your next attempt.

2. What You Can Expect From Using Affirmations

I began my self-improvement journey 6 years ago. Without giving away too many personal details, I grew up in an oppressive religious environment, had terrible social anxiety and no life skills whatsoever. 

Just like you, I started with simple affirmations because I was too scared to approach a single girl. I got the affirmations wrong at first, but with trial and error, I finally got the formula.

It was a long and difficult journey. But 6 years later, my life is the best it's ever been:

As seen in the pictures below, you can do the same!

Affirmations Can Help Transform Your Life Over 2-5 Years

If you’re patient and combine consistent action with affirmations, I guarantee you’ll be unrecognizable in just a few years.

Just be patient!

Do Not Expect Results Without Actions

I get it, as a beginner, taking action seems scary and you just don't know where to start. Plus, theoretically, "on paper," affirmations alone (without any real life action) should be enough to manifest your desires. However, it just doesn't work that way and most people, including you, don't want to admit it, even though you know it's true.

This is why affirmations are constantly ridiculed. It's seen as a way to avoid the real world where all the manly, dirty work is done.

But I want you to shift your paradigm:

Repeat it with me 5 times: 

90% action, 10% affirmations. 

90% action, 10% affirmations. 

90% action, 10% affirmations. 

90% action, 10% affirmations. 

90% action, 10% affirmations.

I can’t heaarrrrr you!

If you can’t take action by yourself, get a good friend or a coach to push you. And although I do provide coaching, this doesn’t have to be me, just get anyone good coach who’s available.

P.S.

To me, the word "manifest" has been misdefined, especially in our context.

No, manifesting doesn't mean that you turn into God and make something out of nothing. 

Manifesting means you've aligned your conscious and subconscious mind with your life's goals, and because you're no longer fighting yourself to take action, results seem to effortlessly manifest themselves.

Affirmations Cannot Teach You Information

Affirmations will never teach you, for example, how to tease girls or how to be a bad boy, but they will make it less stressful or even effortless to read their respective guides:

1. The Guide: 74 Methods To Tease A Girl [& Learn Cock-Funny] | Dating Armory
2. In-Depth Guide: 29 Steps to be the Bad Boy | Dating Armory 

I know you’ll enjoy these guides too 😉 

Consistent Action + Consistent Learning + Consistent Affirmation = Results

Affirmations Cannot Change You Physically

Affirmations cannot:

Again, affirmations only influence subconscious beliefs. It’s not a magic spell, it’s not a miracle potion.

Subliminal Affirmations Cannot Hypnotize You

Yes, studies show that just like any affirmation, subliminal affirmations can help nudge you in a certain direction. 

For example, one study showed that showing participants winning picture prompts made them more likely to place a bet in a slot machine.

In another study, researchers found that subliminal messages could get participants to prefer one brand of soft drink over another.

So yes, they work. And that’s why I’ll be providing an audio sample later. 

However, you must keep in mind that there’s no kind of affirmations which will turn you into a hypnotized zombie. [1, 2, 3]

Affirmations Have Long Lasting Effects 

In a study entitled: Recursive processes in self-affirmation: intervening to close the minority achievement gap, the researchers found that:

“Additionally, treated students' self-perceptions showed long-term benefits. Findings suggest that because initial psychological states and performance determine later outcomes by providing a baseline and initial trajectory for a recursive process, apparently small but early alterations in trajectory can have long-term effects. Implications for psychological theory and educational practice are discussed.”

Unlike other quick fixes you’ve tried in the past, the following techniques will have a lasting impact. 

Affirmation Basics: Creating Affirmations That Manifest

3. What Kind Of Love Do You Want To Manifest

The diagram below represents the 6 types of relationships:

As you see, we all want different relationships. But how can you know for sure which one you want to manifest?

To do that, let’s answer 4 meaningful goal setting questions based on Tony Robbins 6 Human Needs:

1. What is more valuable to you: variety/ novelty or certainty/ security? 
2. What is more valuable to you: being significant or love/ connection? 
3. What is more valuable to you: self-growth or contribution?

Write your answers down on a large sheet of paper. (Keep the paper around, we’ll be using it throughout this guide.)

Done?

Good. 

From doing this exercise with my coaching clients, you’ll see yourself fall into one of the following 2 groups:

Group Freedom

If you generally prefer variety, being significant and self growth, you fall into Group Freedom. 

As a member of Group Freedom, you’re ‘The Bad Boy’ and feel happiest on the left side of the diagram: one night stands, mini relationships and open relationships.

You’ll also gain tremendously by reading my 6,822 word write-up: In-Depth Guide: 29 Steps to be the Bad Boy

Group Connection

If you generally prefer certainty, love and contribution, you fall into Group Connection. 

As a member of Group Connection, you’re boyfriend/ father material and feel happiest on the right side of the diagram: half-open relationship, monogamous relationship and marriage. 

As boyfriend material, you’ll gain most by reading this guide: 55 Tried-and-True Steps to Get a Girlfriend at Middle, High School and College

Now that you know which group you’re in, write down:

1. The group you fall into: Group Freedom or Group Connection?
2. The type of relationship you desire

What Kind Of Woman Would Best Meet Your Needs? 

Since we'll be using these details to create your affirmations, describe the woman of your dreams in as much detail as possible. Write at least several paragraphs as you answer the following questions: 

Do you want to find the perfect wife to be the mother of your children? In what ways is she caring?

Or do you want a super sexy, crazy girl who's basically a nymphomaniac? 

Is she an outdoor girl who loves to go to the beach? Can you describe her body in detail? What is she like in bed?

What kind of friends does she have? Is she an introvert or an extrovert? Is she creative, artistic, or plays an instrument? 

Does she know how to cook? What hobbies does she have?

Does she have money? How does she dress? What city does she live in?

You can also make a "Must Haves" vs. "Optional" list to clarify your standards.

4. Why Do You Want To Manifest Love

Now that you have your ‘What’, let’s find your ‘Why’ as Friedrich Nietzsche famously said, “He who has a strong enough why can bear almost any how.”

Write down:

1. Why did you prefer those values mentioned above?
2. Why do you want your specific kind of relationship?
3. Why do you want to manifest your specific kind of woman or wife?

To make sure you're writing about what makes you authentically happy and not trying to mimic an Instagram lifestyle that looks cool for external approval, get in touch with your deepest self as you go through this exercise.

Here’s my downloadable PDF worksheet (opens in new tab) that covers all 9 self-introspection questions with more details and examples with plenty of room to write.

My stupid advice: print it out and do this goal setting exercise all over again when you’re all alone and without any distraction. 

5. Define Your Current ‘self’

Affirmations can work from whatever level you're starting from, but if you don't have concrete coordinates on where you are right now in terms of your self-image, your beliefs, and your fears, how can you expect your "metal GPS" to give you clear directions to your final destination?

The following are some markers to get a bearing on your current skill set:

A) Define Your General Social Skills Level

There are 3 general levels:

1. Terrible social skills, massive social anxiety and even trauma
2. Mediocre social skills, bad with women (read: Why Don’t Girls Like Me: 9 Common Reasons)
3. Good social skills, mediocre with women

Be honest with yourself. 

B) Externalize Your Fears And Beliefs

Here are some common fears:

1. Scared to be direct with girls 
2. Scared to approach girls (one street, gym or bar)
3. Scared to go out on dates

Comment below your list of top 10 fears and any other underlying or core beliefs you find yourself fighting. We want to find your dark fear and shine a light on them. 

C) Define Yourself Self-Image 

I find the best way to discover what your current self-image is to draw yourself on a piece of paper. A comic version is fine, no need to be photorealistic. 

Once drawn, answer the following character-defining questions:

1. What do you see your character looking like? 
2. Does he go to the gym often?
3. How does he dress?
4. What’s his body language?
5. Does he have a big smile?
6. Does he look lovable or even likable? 
7. What kind of friends does he have?
8. Is he introverted or extroverted?
9. What kind of job does he have?
10. What kind of relationship is he in?
11. What kind of hobbies does he have?
12. Does he have a pet?
13. What drives him in life?
14. What kinds of emotions do you see him feeling?
15. What does he struggle with?
16. Is he dealing with trauma or is he living his best life?
17. What kind of thoughts are going around in his head? 
18. What does he expect in his future? 

After answering these 18 questions and completing the previous exercises, we can finally move onto making real affirmations that manifest. 

(You could also create a realistic action plan, but that’s not the topic of this guide.)

P.S.

As part of goal setting we’ll also Define Your New Self Identity, but that’ll come later with my advanced techniques and full identity transformations. 

Creating Simple, Short Term and Single Belief Affirmations

6. Exclusively Use Realistic Affirmations

Let’s at the Conscious vs Subconscious Mind Affirmations Diagram again:

If you take away just one nugget of useful information from this entire guide, let it be this: 

Whether you're creating short-term or long-term goal-oriented affirmations, make sure they're realistic. 

If you don't believe what you're saying, your subconscious won't buy it either, and in fact it will have the opposite effect.

Imagine you're an ugly guy with no style, broke and living in your mom's basement (I bet some of you are haha) and every morning you look in your broken mirror and say:

“I Am mAkE 5 FiGuReS MoNtHlY, i aM BeTtEr lOoKiNg tHaN JaSoN MoMoA AnD I CaN SeDuCe aNy gIrL”

You know what your brain is gonna say right back? 

“NO WAY IN HELL YOU ARE. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!? YOU ARE ONE BROKE ASS B*TCH AND YOU’RE GONNA STAY THAT WAY BECAUSE THAT’S JUST WHO YOU ARE.”

Now your brain has not only rejected your half-assed, delusional affirmation, it has instilled the opposite image as true.

You want to try to convince your brain in the same way that you would try to convince anyone else with whom you're having a disagreement. Do you get all aggressive and force your beliefs? No, that would only make them more defensive in their position and less open-minded. Instead, you pick a middle point/"no man's land" where you think you can gain some ground and move slowly from there.

It is never OK to lie to yourself and force yourself to feel happy or confident just because you've read The Power of Positive Thinking. It's a dangerous form of toxic positivity, and more often than not it will lower your self-esteem. 

I'll add that I understand why many of my coaching clients have a tendency to jump to grandiose affirmations. It's easier to pretend things are better than your ideals, it doesn't feel good to accept where you are, and the use of grandiose affirmations can make you think you'll get faster results.

Here are some more examples of what not to do:

1. I am the most charismatic guy in the world
2. Every woman dreams to sleep with me
3. I can seduce any woman instantly
4. I can make any hot girl my girlfriend

These are not only unrealistic for your current level, but for any man on this earth. Even the dating coaches only get laid 1 out of every 30 girls they approach. 

Here are an example of what IS useable:

"Because I am learning the right material and have an experienced dating coach who pushes me to take action every day, in 6 months I will have mostly gotten over my crippling approach anxiety and in 1 year I will be able to confidently approach girls by myself and get solid numbers, dates and even a lay or two."

I know it’s not as marketable as saying “this $997 secret mind altering affirmation formula will make your d*ck grow by 2 inches in 21 days so be careful when you pay me for it”, but unfortunately, this is what works - and it’s backed up by science:

In a research article titled Positive Self-Statements: Power for Some, Peril for Others, the authors discuss the true effectiveness to affirmations: 

Hence, when some individuals repeat the statement, ‘‘I am a lovable person,’’ they may say to themselves (consciously or not), ‘‘But I know I’m not as lovable as I could be, or as lovable as Chris…’’ 

“Moderately positive self-statements involving specific attributes (e.g., ‘‘I select good gifts for people’’) may be less likely than global (e.g., ‘‘I am a generous person’’) or extremely positive self-statements to arouse disconfirming thoughts or self-verification motives among people with low self esteem. However, outlandish, unreasonably positive self-statements, such as ‘‘I accept myself completely,’’ are often encouraged by self-help books. Our results suggest that such self statements may harm the very people they are designed for people with low self-esteem.”

In short, if you have low self-esteem don’t say extremely positive self-statements. 

P.S.

As we mentioned earlier, to get results, it's always 90% action, 10% affirmations (and other self-help mind work). Without action, affirmations alone become unrealistic and therefore harmful. Take Action!

7. Use “You Are” And Avoid “I Am”

While I teach that there's no right way to use affirmations, there is one rule everyone must follow. I believe it's more beneficial to start with "You are" rather than "I am" because it's the same way your subconscious mind talks back to you! It's how we talk. It's natural and your brain understands it.

Just try this little experiment for yourself. Look in the mirror and say:

"I am capable of building myself up and becoming an attractive man”

Notice how you feel. 

Now do the same thing and say:

"You are capable of building yourself up and becoming an attractive man”

Doesn't it strike harder? You're talking to the little boy inside of you and telling him to wake the hell up!

8. Live In The Outcome, Not Your Action Plan

For long-term affirmations, you must first outline your plan of action. Then you must state definitively that you'll achieve your goals within a certain period of time. 

However, for short-term affirmations, you'll want to use general Law of Attraction advice: enter the state of the wish fulfilled.

Avoid saying things like ‘you will’, ‘you want’ or ‘you need’. 

Instead, say ‘You are’:

You approach 3 girls a day

You go to the gym 3 days a week

You are capable of talking to girls

If your subconscious mind feels that you’re already there, it’ll make it happen.

9. Grateful Affirmations

Continuing with Live In the Outcome, Not Your Action Plan, another trick is to tell your subconscious mind to be grateful for achieving your short term goal even though you’re not there yet. 

You are grateful for having the inner drive to approach 3 girls a day

You are grateful for each of your 3 weekly workouts

You are grateful for the ability to talk to girls

10. Don’t Overcomplicate Affirmations

Here’s an example from overcomplicated affirmations from reddit:

And of course, the title of the Reddit post is called My Seduction Affirmations which is already super cringe. At one point he even says “I don’t hold my drink in front of my chest. I hold it low to my hip. Better yet, I don’t hold one at all.”

Oof!

Think military training. The best exercises are clear and simple. The only thing left to do is drill them in - day in and day out. 

11. Avoid Simplistic Affirmations

There are 2 markers to a simplistic affirmations:

Single Sentence

We are persuading your brain the same way a marketer sells to his audience. One sentence isn’t enough for anyone.

Vague

Affirmations with no clear descriptions or markers. Will be discussed further in How To Avoid Being Vague And Zero In On Your Affirmations.

Here of some examples of what not to do:

I am extremely attractive and funny.

I believe in my abilities

I am a true winner

Don’t over complicate things and avoid being simplistic. Find a happy balance.

12. Backup Your Affirmations With Facts

Share as much evidence to your conscious mind so it allows your affirmation to sneak into your subconscious mind. Here are some examples:

You approach girls well in a bar because just last weekend you talked to this girl ‘Katy’ and while she had to go, she was happy to speak to you

You are a good looking guy because you’ve gotten many compliments on your beard 

You have good style because your friends told you last week how your coat looks great on you

Yes, some of the "evidence" is weak and even somewhat irrelevant. But you've got to be the sneaky lawyer who gets the judge on your side to admit the evidence into court and win the case.

And you know what else is not related? My 4,977 word guide that you need to read. And don’t worry, it opens in a new tab: 22 Smooth Steps to Approach Girls at the Bar [& 34 Practical Examples]

13. Add Emotional Words To Your Affirmations 

Part of Living In The Outcome is not just saying that you’ve already achieved it. It’s about generating the emotional feeling that you’ve made it. And as you’ll learn, the subconscious mind only understands emotion, everything else is meaningless.

So the first step is writing down the feelings you’d be having if you achieved your goals right now. Be as descriptive as possible.

Next, take those emotional words and add them to your affirmations.

If you need some inspiration, check out some examples below:

14. How Many Affirmations Should I Have 

For every local belief you want to change, have 3 different affirmations. And for your self-image, have 10-15 affirmations. In total you should have about 30-50 affirmations. 

Having multiple affirmations per desired outcome is to avoid Semantic Satiation, as Wikipedia explains:  

Semantic satiation is a psychological phenomenon in which repetition causes a word or phrase to temporarily lose meaning for the listener, who then perceives the speech as repeated meaningless sounds. Extended inspection or analysis (staring at the word or phrase for a lengthy period of time) in place of repetition also produces the same effect.

In other words, saying the same seduction affirmation 5 times will make it lose emotional affect by the 5th time. Better to have variety using different emotional words.

How to Be Precise and Avoid Vague Affirmations

As with any affirmation, you need to be crystal clear with your imagery and your goals. 

However, this is especially useful when it comes to using the Law of Attraction to write love or seduction affirmations, because there is no objective number to put on love, unlike a classic money affirmation, e.g. I will make 'x' amount of money per year.

You want your mind seeing this in your bedroom:

Not this:

Below are 3 critical clarifying elements to build into the structure of your affirmations.

15. Affirm The Negative As Well

I know that almost everyone on the internet says that negative affirmations are bad because “speaking in negative terms will bring up negative imagery which will then negatively program your mind.” 

It's like if I told you not to visualize a pink elephant. Of course you're going to see a pink elephant.

Or if a stranger comes up to you and says, "Don't worry, I'm not here to hurt you. The first thing you'll think is that he's going to hurt you!

Sounds simple, right? 

Well, I disagree. 

If you only focus on the negative, then duh, you’re right. 

But if you combine negative and positive affirmations to get a very clear vision of what you want, you'll end up with a super precise, positive mental image that your brain can clearly understand.

Here’s how you can combine this technique using our examples from earlier:

Unlike the guys on the side of the bar who are swiping on Tinder, you are good at approaching girls in a bar, because just last weekend you were talking to this girl 'Katy', and even though she had to leave, she was happy to talk to you. (In this example, the negative images aren't even about you. They're about the guys sitting on the side. And by the way, I can tell you from experience that it feels really good when you're on a date with a cool girl and the guys sitting next to you are swiping on Tinder).

You are a good looking guy who doesn’t treat his body like shit because you’ve gotten many compliments on your beard. (This example uses the negative imagery for two purposes: as factual proof and to clarify the affirmation.)

You have good style and don’t look shabby because your friends told you last week how your coat looks great on you

As long as you don’t focus on the negative, you’re good. 

16. Have Objective Markers

Saying vague affirmations like "I'm good with women" not only leaves you with an ambiguous goal, but also makes you judge yourself every step of the way.

Who said you’re ‘good with women’ until you can seduce every girl you look at?

In other words, you fall into the pit of perfectionism.

Objective, realistic markers prevent that. 

Here are some objective markers to add into your love affirmations:

These are all numbers you need to be tracking anyways as a beginner, so adding them to your affirmations is easy.

Of course, this only works if you're using affirmations to get laid. If you're trying to manifest a wife, it gets trickier, and frankly, I don't have a good solution for you. Comment below if you have any ideas.

17. Have Subjective Markers

But what if you want to build masculine affirmations or general confidence affirmations? 

There are no objective metrics to measure that!

That's where you use subjective markers, and here's how it works:

You find a role model (even a fictional one) and you tell yourself that you are more masculine or just as masculine as that character. If the character is too much for you, you can also affirm that you have the same specific masculine traits.

Here are some more ways to rebuild your masculinity: 17 Exclusive Steps to Be More Masculine | Dating Armory 

Creating Difficult, Long-Term and Self-Identity Affirmations

18. Define Your New Self Identity 

In the movie Fight Club (1999), in the bus scene, Tyler Turden tells ‘The Narrator’ that “Self improvement is masturbation. Now self destruction…”

I interpret this to mean that instead of using self-help to change each belief, one at a time, why don’t we tear the whole house down and build a new self-identity as you can see in the illustration below:

This is especially important once you consider ‘Self-Affirmation Theory’ and ‘Labeling Theory’ as Cassandra Krueger and Kelly Trussoni explain in their research paper Women’s Self-Concept and the Effects of Positive or Negative Labeling Behaviors:

Labeling theory states that people tend to act in accordance with the labels that others assign to them. When a person is assigned a label they tend to view themselves and act in such a way that promotes them to be labeled in that way. For example, when people label juveniles as delinquent, they tend to act in ways that reinforce the label they are given. In a study done by Liu (2000), delinquent youth were shown to be involved in more delinquent acts when parents labeled them as delinquent. These results suggest that both perceived and actual labeling by parents increase the likelihood of subsequent delinquent youth activities. 

Imagine you're a super fat 25-year-old guy. And you've been that way your whole life, for as long as you can remember. After all these years, whether you realize it or not, you've come to identify as fat. And no matter how many diets, books, or workouts you do, you are still fat, and any weight you temporarily lose will all come right back because you are fat.

Until you change that fat subconscious self-image, nothing you consciously try to do to change your eating habits will work. 

Funnily enough, I had the opposite problem as a child. I generally didn't like to eat (it only got worse after a bad choking incident), and after a while I got the nickname "Bone" because I was so skinny. Fortunately, that self-image didn't last too long and now I eat well and lift 3-5 times a week.

This whole concept applies to attracting women the same way.

We’ve already Defined Your Old Self-Image way back in the introduction. Now you’re going to define your new identity using the same excise as before:

Start by drawing your ideal future self on a piece of paper. A comic version is fine, no need to be photorealistic. 

Once drawn, answer the following character defining questions:

1. What do you see your character looking like? 
2. Does he go to the gym often?
3. How does he dress?
4. What’s his body language?
5. Does he have a big smile?
6. Does he look lovable or even likable? 
7. What kind of friends does he have?
8. Is he introverted or extroverted?
9. What kind of job does he have?
10. What kind of relationship is he in?
11. What kind of hobbies does he have?
12. Does he have a pet?
13. What drives him in life?
14. What kinds of emotions do you see him feeling?
15. What does he struggle with?
16. Is he dealing with trauma or is he living his best life?
17. What kind of thoughts are going around in his head? 
18. What does he expect in his future? 

Now that you have your ideal self-image clearly defined, we can attempt to affirm it into your subconscious mind. It’s never gonna require the same simple tools as changing a local belief, but the payoff is much higher.

19. Pre-Affirm Your Negative Feelings 

Don’t try to repress your negative feelings when you’re affirming a positive self-image, instead externalize it, as Susan Jeffers always said “feel the fear and do it anyways.”

Here’s an example affirmation for a self-image that’ll help you manifest a wife:

You don’t feel worthy of having a lovely wife because of your childhood trauma. You see yourself as an outcast of society. You know that it’s a real feeling and that's okay. You also know that the past stays in the past and now, in this moment, you are a man capable of getting a lovely wife. As you’ve been going to gym, you have a great body and you have a quirky personality which makes you stand out. Girls love that.

It feels painful, but you’ve affirmed your darkest thoughts and replaced it with a positive paradigm. 

For some actionable tips to be naturally attractive, read 27 Stupidly-Obvious Ways to Become an Attractive Man & Attractive to Girls

20. Build-Up Affirmations Technique

For those dealing with severe childhood trauma and a horrific self-image, use my Build-Up Affirmations Technique. 

As named, you start with the basic human foundations and then…build up:

You are a human being. As a human, you do not feel guilty for being alive or enjoying life. You did not deserve what was done to you as a child and what has left you with a false image of yourself. You will heal because that is a natural human trait. You refuse to trash yourself and you are on your own side. You are your own best friend. You are capable of love and even though bad things have happened to you, your life has only started. Things are about to get a whole lot better. More love, a great body and good money. You are working hard to make this happen because this is who you are. 

Using a simplistic affirmation such as “I am worth of love” would only leave your traumatized brain to violently respond with “No, the fuck you aren't, you filthy piece of shit. You're a worthless fucking idiot and no one can ever love you.”

Again, this isn’t a "marketable affirmation" to get laid, but it works. 

If you do want to get laid, click on my article and don’t worry, it opens in a new tab: 17 Steps to Seduce Girls [& Countless Examples] | Dating Armory 

21. ‘You Are’ Vs ‘You Are Becoming’

Say you're an anxiety-ridden virgin, and every morning you look in your bathroom mirror and say, "You're a sexy man who can easily seduce women”.

This is unrealistic and your brain, which is great at detecting self-deception, will immediately confirm the opposite to be true by flashing past scenes of you being a social retard in front of everyone you know.

To avoid this mess, make a realistic affirmation by starting with "you are becoming," or if that's still too much, say "you are on your way to becoming," or some version of that.

For example:

As you are taking action by getting the right dating material and have an authentic coach who is pushing you past your fears, you are on your way to become a sexually attractive man who has solid skills to seduce women.

If that’s still too much, you can add as many layers as you like, e.g. “you are confident that you are on your way to become”, etc. 

22. Affirm That You Will Take Specific Action

We’ve touched on this element throughout this article. 

Simply add that you will take action and what specific steps you’ll take to make your new character a reality. 

The first part of the example above is perfectly fine:

As you are taking action by getting the right dating material and have an authentic coach who is pushing you past your fears, you are on your way to become a sexually attractive man who has solid skills to seduce women.

More examples:

You are a determined man who is cultivating the skills and confidence to approach women by taking the right courses and mentors that will inevitably make the things you want come true. 

Every day you work on reducing your fear of approaching women. You approach 3 girls a day and do 1 rejection therapy exercise. 

Your engagement with dating advice material increases your skill as a seducer and lover.

It's only a matter of time before you have 3 girlfriends because you are actively engaging with dating advice material. Read: Get Girls To Chase You: 14 Techniques I Use [With Examples]

And by the way, research backs this up. In a paper titled Effort Self-Talk Benefits the Mathematics Performance of Children With Negative Competence Beliefs, the researchers found, and I quote:

“…effort self-talk benefited the performance of children holding negative competence beliefs: It severed the association between negative competence beliefs and poor performance. By internally asserting that they will deliver effort, children with negative competence beliefs can optimize their achievement in school.”

23. Affirm The Date 

If there’s no end time where your dream will become a reality, your brain won’t know when to make things happen. In general, you want to follow the SMART Goals guidelines: 

24. Affirm Your Core Values

Think back to What Kind Of Love Do You Want To Manifest, where we spoke about the 6 defining values of your personality. Now it’s time to use those same values to drive forward your new self-image: 

Because you deeply value your personal freedom, need the variety of meeting new, pretty women and love the challenge which keeps you happy, you take ‘x’ action on a daily basis which will put you well on your way to become an experienced seducer who can sleep with 1 out of 30 women he cold approaches by ‘x’ date. 

If you have any other core values, add them into the soup. 

This stuff really works!

In fact, in a paper titled The Impact of Self-Affirmation on Health-Behavior Change: A Meta-Analysis, researches reported:

“Self-affirmation inductions—such as questionnaires or writing exercises that remind participants of their important personal values—may have the potential to reduce defensive resistance to health-risk information…Deploying self-affirmation inductions alongside persuasive health information has positive effects, promoting message acceptance, intentions to change, and subsequent behavior.”

Whether you want to attract your crush or lose weight, affirming your core values work.

25. Say “You Want To Want…”

Saying ‘You want to want’ is useful in two key scenarios:

You’re Struggling With Something Especially Difficult

It could be losing weight for someone who’s been fat their whole life. Or in our topic, struggling to get yourself to approach your first girl. 

You’re Dealing With Religious Guilt/Trauma And Want To Get Over It. 

You want to fully enjoy spending time with girls (not just for sex), but your ‘down’bringing is guilt tripping you every step of the way. Personally, as an ex-religious guy, it has not been easy for me to come to terms with my bisexuality, and many of my ex-religious coaching clients have told me the same.

So in either of these scenarios, you start your affirmation with ‘I want to want’ or any version of that:

I want to want to enjoy spending my time talking to girls

I desire the inner drive to approach girls

I will get the motivation to do ‘x’ action

26. Possibility-Affirmations Technique

Here are some examples:

You are willing to believe that you could…

You are open to…

You hope to one day believe that you are… and are not… 

Will you do ‘x’ action?

There is a possibility that you will make ‘x’ happen

Use the Possibility-Affirmations Technique as a last resort when you’re in a dark place and nothing concrete seems to be happening. These Possibility-Affirmations open ‘possibilities’ in your mind and get the ball rolling. 

27. Affirm your current life

Take the following 3 scenarios:

As you can see, all the evidence is proving to your mind that you’re better than the shitty self-image that you’ve been dragging along ever since you’ve been traumatized as a kid, but it still won’t go away! 

The simple solution is to: 

Affirm your current life. 

That is, 

To apply these steps, use the following template:

Your current self image is [Insert Old Self-Image]. You carry this outdated self-image from past traumatic childhood experiences, such as [Insert Several Traumatic Experiences]. Therefore, it is simply natural for your mind to carry such self beliefs. However, over the past 16 months, you’ve done extensive work on yourself. You’ve been hitting the gym regularly, possibly even more than you should. You’ve lost over 15KG and you look like a new man. Your old friends tell you that you’re unrecognizable! But that’s not all, you’ve gotten solid dating advice, approached dozens of pretty girls every month, got some numbers and dates and even took 3 girls home! [Insert Your Own Detailed Personal Success Stories With Girls, No Matter How Small.] And beyond my physical health and social life, you’ve begun a remodeling on your financial success and it’s only going to improve. [Insert Actions You’re Taking To Improve Your Financial Success.] Therefore, it is only logical and realistic to see myself as [Insert New Self-Image]. And beyond all of this, because I am consistent, there’s no way I won’t achieve my wildest dreams [Insert Your Wildest Dreams].

If you’ve been taking action, just reading this over should make you feel weird as you naturally relate to it very strongly. 

28. Affirmations To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back 

Affirmations are exclusively about you. They change you and only you. 

This means that, by definition, affirmations cannot bring your ex back or for that matter, attract any specific person. 

However, combining affirmation with specific strategies can work together to turn you into the man she’ll be happy to come back to. 

Below is an affirmations template to get your ex back:

While you understand that your ex [her name] left you because of [unattractive qualities you had], you are a new man. By taking action over the last [insert time period], specifically [insert actions you took], you have developed [insert new attractive qualities]. This makes you confident that if you strategically get back in touch with her, she'll see you in a new light, and she'll be back with you in no time!

Adapt it for your needs and if you have another template or questions, post them in the comments below. 

How to Put Affirmations Into Practice

While we haven't gone over my full list of affirmations, you now have my complete formula and should have some of your own personal affirmations written down.

The following is specific instructions on how to use them effectively. 

29. Congruent Body Affirmations Technique

If you have younger siblings or spend time with children in general, you'll notice that when they lie to you about not having done something bad, they often nod their heads. 

It's hilarious when you're dealing with children, but when you have incongruent body language while saying affirmations, you lose much-needed effectiveness as your mind sees through your lies.

So here’s what to look out for:

There’s a also a great study backing this up titled: The Effects of Overt Head Movements on Physical Performance After Positive Versus Negative Self-Talk and I quote:

“…positive self-statements led to better performance than negative self-statements in 2 out of 3 physical tasks… self-statements are significantly more impactful on physical performance in the head nodding condition than in the head-shaking condition.”

30. Feel Emotion In Your Body

First, we need to ask ourselves what kind of emotions we want to feel when we practice affirmations. 

Everyone is in agreement that you don't want to feel negative emotions. 

However, some gurus say that you want to feel calm to allow the beliefs to sneak into your mind while others say you gotta feel powerful to overcome any doubts. 

So which one is it? 

I say, it depends:

A) If You’re Programming Short Tem Beliefs:

Go the calm route. It’s not a massive change so you won’t feel much resistance anyways. 

You’ll be doing lots of slow breathing, listening to calm music and lying down.

B) If You’re Manifesting Long Term Goals And A New Self-Image:

Feel powerful. You’re gonna feel a lot of heavy resistance and you’re gonna need that power to break through. 

You’ll be doing aggressive breathing techniques, making grand gestures with powerful body language, shouting your affirmations and getting your whole body riled up. 

In either case, you’ll be moving your body to achieve your desired emotion, the last thing you want to do is go through your affirmations like a forced prayer.

31. Use An Authoritative Voice

Think of the scene in Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard where Samuel L. Jackson/ Darius Kincaid has to convince Ryan Reynolds/ Michael Bryce that even though he lost his bodyguard license, it doesn't matter and they can still save the world. 

He does this by getting Michael Bryce to affirm that "I'm unlicensed and I don't give a fuck!"

At first he fails his "affirmation"...

But with some coaching from Darius Kincaid, he shouts his affirmation with an authoritative voice:

To be clear: I don't mean in a loud voice or anything particularly powerful. I just mean authoritative. Your mind has to feel that you are sure of yourself.

• To deeper understand the mechanisms in the persuasive powers of authority, read Influence by Robert Cialdini: Chapter 6 - Authority.
• To get practical steps to developing an authoritative voice, read: 48 Proven Methods To Talk More Clearly, Confidently And Slowly [+ Sound More Masculine]

32. Use Breathing Techniques

As mentioned, for short term goals, you’ll want to breathe in a calming way, such as the following 4-7-8 Breathing Technique Guided Meditation by Take A Deep Breath:

If you’re doing long term goals, go for powerful breathing techniques. One of my favorites being the following powerful breathing meditation by Wim Hof. 

These are meant to be done before you start saying affirmations, of course, but if you have trouble staying in a positive mental state, you can always combine the breathing with the affirmations.

33. Use Background Music 

I’ve noticed on many blogs and forums, especially, Reddit [3, 4, 5], that binaural beats should be used as background affirmations music to help achieve a calmer state of mind. However, I’ve looked around and haven’t found any studies. In fact, some studies report the opposite to be true 

This review has aimed to give a brief overview of ABS (Auditory Beat Stimulation) and its role in cognition and potential use as a therapeutic tool for modulating mood states. While findings for most putative applications up to now are either solitary or contradictory, several studies consistently report a diminishing impact of binaural-beat stimulation on anxiety levels. 

The researchers do conclude that binaural beats or their contradictory effects are not entirely understood: 

The underlying neural mechanisms are still yet to be unraveled. Understanding how and where the binaural-beat percept is generated and which cortical networks are most affected will aid in the optimization of both monaural and binaural-beat stimulation as a tool to modulate cognitive and mode states. Many studies employing ABS as either a mechanistic tool or potential therapeutic aid, report contrasting findings. Further research, including more accurate reporting of experimental protocols, especially those studies undertaken in a clinical setting, will help to clarify the most promising effects.

For an overview of all the major studies, take a look at these articles: Binaural Beats Health benefits, dosage, safety, side-effects, and more and Binaural Beats: What Are They and What Are the Benefits?.

In conclusion, I don’t see any major concern with using binaural beats if you find that they work for you. But if you want to play it safe, stick to any background music that'll help you get into your preferred emotional state:

For short term goals and local belief changes, you’ll use meditative music to bring you into a calm state, such as the one below.

For long term goals and self-image transformations, you’ll want to use inspirational music to put you into a powerful state, such as the one below.

34. Use Your Imagination 

Whether you’re manifesting short or long term goals, you gotta have a crystal clear vision of it in your mind and keep it there until your dreams become a reality. 

Trying using your imagination to feel it with all your senses: 

But to make things really real in your mind. The 5 basic senses aren’t enough. Here’s a more complete list from SensoryTrust.org:

Thermoception - the sense of heat (there is some debate that the sense of cold may be a separate sense)

Nociception - the perception of pain

Equilibrioception - the perception of balance

Proprioception - the perception of body awareness (close your eyes and touch your nose. Got it first time? That's proprioception in action)

The radiation senses: sense of color, sense of moods associated with color, sense of temperature.

The feeling senses: sensitivity to gravity, air and wind pressure, and motion.

The chemical senses: hormonal sense, such as pheromones, hunger for food, water or air.

The mental senses: pain, external and internal, mental or spiritual distress, sense of self, including friendship, companionship and power, psychic capacity.

Because I find myself reminding the following to my coaching clients, I’ll remind you too: if you don’t consciously control your imagination, your old self-identity will hijack it with negative visuals and you’ll be wasting your time with affirmations!

35. Affirmation-Story Technique

In continuation of the discussion on imagination, as a younger man I had a very difficult time manipulating my imagination to follow my affirmations. Either my ADHD would distract me, or my negative thoughts would shake me out of it...or both!

So I developed the Affirmation Story Technique and it's very simple: instead of saying 2-3 sentence affirmations, write a day-in-the-life story of your future life in present tense.

If you're looking for examples or guidelines, don't overthink it. Just go for 1000-3000 words, be descriptive, and you'll be fine. I'd show you copies of my old ones, but I'm way too embarrassed lol…the most I can do I show you a blurred out picture haha:

As I consistently applied the Affirmation Story Technique, I immediately noticed several benefits:

You and I both know that this article is supposed to be about boring "I am" affirmations. But hell, this is my blog, so I'll break the rule. Here's my advice to you: just write 2-3 stories like this, rotate through them by listening to one every night, and you'll never have to say an affirmation again, plus you'll get better results!

36. Listen To Your Affirmations

I’m a big fan of listening to affirmations for 4 key reasons:

A) The Power Of Passive Acceptance

When I first started using affirmations as a teenager, I quickly realized that listening to affirmations allowed them to slip into my subconscious more easily because my conscious mind was less alert than, say, when actively reading affirmations aloud.

I was pleasantly surprised when I found a research article titled When Self-Help Materials Help: Examining The Effects Of Self Discrepancy And Modes Of Delivery Of Positive Self-Statements which proposed the same theory:

Olejnik (1978) summarized the differences between reading and listening in terms of levels of information processing. In the reading process, the text must be translated from visual code to verbal code before being processed as information. Unlike reading, in the listening process, the same materials are already presented in the verbal code; it is therefore not necessary that the information is processed in a deep way. More importantly, a reader can easily go back, skim, and selectively concentrate on the materials that have caught his or her attention, whereas a listener cannot recheck the word and can solely rely on his or her memory of the materials. A listener can only process information from an audio recording at a relatively superficial level, but a reader can selectively focus on the information for deeper information processing. Because of the difference in the levels of processing, any discrepancy between the positive self-statements and the receiver’s self-concept may more likely be detected when these statements are presented in text, in contrast to in audio recordings. When positive self-statements are presented in auditory mode, participants may only engage in superficial information processing of those statements, such as the literal meaning of the statements or the quality of the presenter’s voice. However, they may not be able to compare these statements with their own self-concept, making discrepancies, if any, to be undetectable.

B) A Good Alternative To Subliminal Affirmations 

The thing that attracts so many people to subliminal affirmations is the automatic passivity of it. All you have to do is plug in the headphones and voila! 

But as we'll soon see, the science behind subliminals is shaky at best. 

Fortunately, listening to your regular affirmations is a better solution. 

They're mostly the same in terms of the passivity aspect, and they've been proven to work, making them a great alternative!

C) Persuasive Powers Of A Self-Assured Voice

The study continues: 

People are more likely to accept the suggestions of positive self-statements delivered in auditory mode because the receivers’ critical attitudes toward the message may be lessened or distracted by the vocal cues or the perceived image of the speaker.

In reality, this is a repeat of what we said in the section Use An Authoritative Voice. The difference is that this is a recording, so you can get anyone with a confident, authoritative voice to make the recording for you which will make your mind more open to these verbal suggestions.

D) Get Comfortable With The Sound Of Your Own Voice

If you decide to record using your own voice, then you'll get another benefit: you'll slowly learn to accept how you sound instead of cringing like most people when they hear themselves.

It's going to be hard at first. But I promise you, it will get better with practice. 

Now you have my 4 reasons to prefer audio-based affirmations. Go ahead and make your own or get someone else to do it for you.

37. Write Down Your Affirmations

I've never written down my affirmations because it reminds me of my terrible time in elementary school where I was constantly punished by my teachers where I was forced to write "I will be a good boy and behave in class" 100 times on the blackboard during detention.

But if you find that it works for you, go for it.

38. Draw Pictures 

If you're an artist: Draw your future self!

But even for those who can't draw (like me!), you can make general drawings of your future self, i.e. how messy your apartment will look after having 2 girls over at once, or how clean it will be when you come home from work to find your beautiful wife waiting for you with a hot meal! 

Whatever you want to manifest, draw it. Your subconscious mind will align with you to make it a reality.

39. Use A Mirror And Eye Contact

As mentioned in our introduction, Use “You Are” And Avoid “I Am”: your "mind" and "you" communicate as if you were 2 different people, i.e. whenever each of you speaks to the other, it's in "you...", never in "I am...".

Using a mirror helps to externalize this interaction by talking to another you; the one you see in the mirror!

So I recommend either using your bathroom mirror:

Or, if you have a crappy bathroom mirror, just buy a big one like the one I own (pictured below) so you can see your full body language.

Unless you're closing your eyes to visualize or listening to affirmations while you're doing something else, use a mirror.

40. Lay down 

When you're using your imagination while using the Affirmation Story Technique, when you're listening to your affirmations, or when you're just tired after a long day, the best place to practice is in your comfortable, warm bed:

When To Say Affirmations

41. Before Talking To Girls

Here’s why I always tell my students to practice affirmations before talking to girls:

1. You’re Pairing Action With Mind Work

As I've said perhaps two and a half thousand times in this article, your attitude must be that affirmations are only a means to an end, i.e., to get you to take action. Affirmations are not, and should never be, an end in themselves.

90% action, 10% mind work. Flip the numbers and I’ll have to agree with Tyler Durden, “Self improvement is masturbation.”

By practicing affirmations right before you take a difficult action, you'll be linking the two together, just the way they're meant to be!

2. You Harness The Social Mechanism Of Affirmations

In a study titled, Social standard setting: The achilles heel of informational accounts of therapeutic change, the researchers were studying the social impact on “two common clinical interventions - self-statements and modeling” to help children deal with their fear of the dark: 

Some children were told that the experimenter would know the specific treatment implemented while other children were led to believe that no one would know the specific treatment they received.

The results were interesting: 

Results showed that when the treatments took place in a public context, children improved an average of 50 sec in dark tolerance. However, when implemented in a private context, children's dark tolerance decreased an average of 2 sec. A nonspecific public control group improved an average of 1 sec in dark tolerance. If the interventions were effective because of new information learned, then the private treatments should have been as effective as the public treatments in changing behavior.

This clearly means that:

The results are interpreted as showing that in this situation these therapies were effective due to specific social influence mechanisms. When public, the treatments appeared to set up social criteria for improved performance. These results and other related research suggest that many common clinical interventions, usually thought of as being effective because of new information learned, may operate through such social mechanisms. 

Okay, so I get it. Social proof matters. I already knew that. What does that have to do with affirmations?

Everything!

If you’re going out with a wing to daygame/ approach girls, his social impact on you could massively increase the effectiveness of your affirmations. 

3. Affirmations Lowers Stress

In a study titled Affirmation of personal values buffers neuroendocrine and psychological stress responses, researched found:

This study experimentally investigated whether affirmations of personal values attenuate physiological and psychological stress responses. Eighty-five participants completed either a value-affirmation task or a control task prior to participating in a laboratory stress challenge. Participants who affirmed their values had significantly lower cortisol responses to stress, compared with control participants. 

(There are many other similar studies such as: Psychological vulnerability and stress: the effects of self-affirmation on sympathetic nervous system responses to naturalistic stressors and Self-Affirmation Improves Problem-Solving under Stress.)

The point is that affirmations keep you calm which helps you take action and makes you more attractive to women!

4. Reframe The Fear

As we discussed in "Pre-Affirming Your Negative Feelings," suppressing your negative beliefs and fears will only make them worse. 

You always want to feel your fears deeply and do it anyway. 

Using tactical affirmations before approaching that pretty girl at the bar can help you put a new lens on the fear by verbalizing how your fears are no longer an immovable block, but just another expected obstacle to overcome.

42. After Talking To Girls 

If you were rejected after talking to the hottie at the gym, you can use affirmations to reframe the rejection into something empowering, e.g. this happens to everyone and is part of the process of learning new social skills. 

If you get her number, then Affirm Your Current Life by using this reference experience to prove to your brain that there's a new you on the block and there's no reason to keep the old self-image around; he moved out months ago!

43. Warm Up Your Vibe

If you force yourself into affirmations while you're angry at the world after a rough day at work, you'll soon find yourself associating negative, powerful emotions with affirmations, and the affirmations won't work!

Instead, you only want to start your affirmations when you are feeling grateful, positive, and generally optimistic. 

Do whatever raises your mood, but personally, I combine breathing techniques and a gratitude meditation by following an Insight Timer meditation called Gratitude To Shift Your Mood by Justin Michael Williams. 

(I am not affiliated with Insight Timer, nor do I pay for Insight Timer Plus, I just love the mostly free app and website).

44. Morning Or Night?

Generally speaking, for short-term goals, do it during the day so you have something to focus on immediately. 

For long-term goals, do it at night before you go to sleep so your subconscious mind has something to work on.

45. Where To Say Your Affirmations

While we've mentioned saying your affirmations in front of your mirror or while lying on your bed, it's important to change things up by going out into nature from time to time, otherwise you run the risk of gradually building up negative vibes in your home. 

By the way, finding a secluded spot in nature is much easier than you think. Even in all the big cities I've lived in, beautiful wooded areas were only an hour's motorcycle ride away.

46. Be Patient And Consistent 

Frankly, I don't care if you say your girlfriend affirmations in the morning or at night, on your bed or in the mirror, or even what technique you use, as long as you're consistent. Just like any other self-improvement technique, affirmations take 3-6 months to start working noticeably. 

Here are a few things to help keep you motivated:

1. Listen To Earl Nightingale - The Strangest Secret

While I don’t agree with everything he says, I love how he emphasizes the need to keep your mind focused on what you want and how that ‘plants the seeds’ to manifest the life you want. 

2. Change Up Your Affirmations

Change your affirmations and play around with the techniques. 

3. Don’t Stay Home

As mentioned, practice your affirmations in nature and in other cool places, keeping yourself at home only makes it more boring. 

4. Use Reminders

If you have ADHD like me, you’ll know how life saving reminders are. Use them here, or better yet, use an affirmations app to remind you directly… 

47. Use Affirmations Apps

Before we talk about which applications to use or buy, it's important to understand that throwing money at something won't make it work. 

You can't buy your way to success.

The following apps can only serve as tools, and in most cases you won't even need to pay for the premium service to get the core functionality:

Insight Timer

Not a dedicated affirmations app, but I love it for several reasons: 

1. Tons of cool courses
2. You get to check in on how your feeling without having to write an essay on how your day went
3. They have great meditation music to play over your affirmations
4. Good sleep tracks 
5. Good breathwork, i.e. guided breathing exercise
6. I don’t pay for it and you don’t have to either. Most of the app is free and the ads aren’t annoying!

Ironically, the one thing I don’t like about Insight Timer is their affirmation audio tracks. They are too simple and break too many of my guidelines. 

Android

iOS

I Am - Daily Affirmations

It looks like a good app with lots of 5 star reviews, but I couldn’t bring myself to pay $20/ year for something like that. 

Pro Tip: if you do end up going for it, wait a week after you download the app and they’ll lower the price to $14.99 which is nice. 

Android 

iOS

Thinkup - Daily Affirmations

Admittedly, I have not used this app. But I've seen some good reviews so it’s another viable option. 

Android 

iOS

Self Pause

Self Pause has good reviews on the app stores, but it also comes with many cool features beyond the basics:

1. They have an AI life coach
2. There affirmations are more than the boring one liners found on most apps
3. Write and record an unlimited number of your own affirmations on the app
4. Take those affirmations and layer them with ambient music in the background
5. They have a affirmations about everything; relationships, health, specific sports and even your financial success

It’s cool, but to gain most of these services you’ll need to pay

Note: Depending on the country you live in, your insurance may cover some of these apps, so be sure to check before you buy.

Any Reminders App

If you are like me and don’t need an app to motivate or help you, make your ‘own’ affirmations app by copying my next 3 tips, starting with: 

Setting a recurring affirmations reminder on your Google Calendar which is…free!

Any Notes App

Use Keep Notes by Google to write your affirmations down or any insights you have throughout the day.

But what most people don't know is that you can also use Keep Notes to set up reminders right from within the app!

First click on the reminders icon a the top right:

Secondly, pick your time and the 'daily' option so you get a recurring reminder. (You can also add your location in the 'Place' tab to the right, but I don't mess with that.)

Any Recording App

To listen to my affirmations, I record them once with the default recording app, then when I’m ready, I play it back on my phone while listening to meditative music on my laptop. 

Make a separate recording for each thing you want to manifest, then use the bookmark and list options to organize everything. 

48. Moderate Your Self Talk

Self-talk is simply how you talk to yourself throughout the day. If you don't keep an eye on your self-talk, it will quickly revert back to your old programming and overwhelm any results your affirmations produce, as shown in the diagram below:

Understandably, it’s a big problem, but here are some ways I keep my self-talk in line with my vision:

And that’s it!

49. Don’t Force It

Whether you're learning to be a bad boy or moderating your self-talk, you need to maintain a balance. 

Forcing doesn't work, it just breeds resentment and guilt. And you might even end up like Stuart Smalley when he talks to Michael Jordan on SNL's "Daily Affirmation show”!

Find what works for you, but one way I keep myself from burning out is to get on my motorcycle every weekend and ride out into nature and immerse myself in the beauty.

When I lived in Israel and before I had my motorcycle, I used to go to the beach, which was about an hour's walk away.

Examples of Affirmations

Below I’ll provide both text and audio affirmation samples. 

50. Affirmations Examples

1. "Because you are learning the right material and have an experienced dating coach who pushes you to take action every day, in 6 months you will have mostly gotten over your crippling approach anxiety and in 1 year you will be able to confidently approach girls by yourself and get solid numbers, dates and even a lay or two."
2. You are capable of building yourself up and becoming an attractive man
3. You approach girls well in a bar because just last weekend you talked to this girl ‘Katy’ and while she had to go, she was happy to speak to you
4. You are a good looking guy because you’ve gotten many compliments on your beard 
5. You have good style because your friends told you last week how your coat looks great on you
6. Unlike the guys on the side of the bar who are swiping on Tinder, you are good at approaching girls in a bar, because just last weekend you were talking to this girl 'Katy', and even though she had to leave, she was happy to talk to you.
7. You are a good looking guy who doesn’t treat his body like shit because you’ve gotten many compliments on your beard. 
8. You have good style and don’t look shabby because your friends told you last week how your coat looks great on you 
9. You don’t feel worthy of having a lovely wife because of your childhood trauma. You see yourself as an outcast of society. You know that it’s a real feeling and that's okay. You also know that the past stays in the past and now, in this moment, you are a man capable of getting a lovely wife. As you’ve been going to gym, you have a great body and you have a quirky personality which makes you stand out. Girls love that.
10. You are a human being. As a human, you do not feel guilty for being alive or enjoying life. You did not deserve what was done to you as a child and what has left you with a false image of yourself. You will heal because that is a natural human trait. You refuse to trash yourself and you are on your own side. You are your own best friend. You are capable of love and even though bad things have happened to you, your life has only started. Things are about to get a whole lot better. More love, a great body and good money. You are working hard to make this happen because this is who you are. 
11. As you are taking action by getting the right dating material and have an authentic coach who is pushing you past your fears, you are on your way to become a sexually attractive man who has solid skills to seduce women.
12. You are a determined man who is cultivating the skills and confidence to approach women by taking the right courses and mentors that will inevitably make the things you want come true. 
13. Every day you work on reducing your fear of approaching women. You approach 3 girls a day and do 1 rejection therapy exercise. 
14. Your engagement with dating advice material increases your skill as a seducer and lover.
15. It's only a matter of time before you have 3 girlfriends because you are actively engaging with dating advice material. 
16. Because you deeply value your personal freedom, need the variety of meeting new, pretty women and love the challenge which keeps you happy, you take ‘x’ action on a daily basis which will put you well on your way to become an experienced seducer who can sleep with 1 out of 30 women he cold approaches by ‘x’ date. 
17. Your current self image is [Insert Old Self-Image]. You carry this outdated self-image from past traumatic childhood experiences, such as [Insert Several Traumatic Experiences]. Therefore, it is simply natural for your mind to carry such self beliefs. However, over the past 16 months, you’ve done extensive work on yourself. You’ve been hitting the gym regularly, possibly even more than you should. You’ve lost over 15KG and you look like a new man. Your old friends tell you that you’re unrecognizable! But that’s not all, you’ve gotten solid dating advice, approached dozens of pretty girls every month, got some numbers and dates and even took 3 girls home! [Insert Your Own Detailed Personal Success Stories With Girls, No Matter How Small.] And beyond my physical health and social life, you’ve begun a remodeling on your financial success and it’s only going to improve. [Insert Actions You’re Taking To Improve Your Financial Success.] Therefore, it is only logical and realistic to see myself as [Insert New Self-Image]. And beyond all of this, because I am consistent, there’s no way I won’t achieve my wildest dreams [Insert Your Wildest Dreams].
18. While you understand that your ex [her name] left you because of [unattractive qualities you had], you are a new man. By taking action over the last [insert time period], specifically [insert actions you took], you have developed [insert new attractive qualities]. This makes you confident that if you strategically get back in touch with her, she'll see you in a new light, and she'll be back with you in no time!
19. Because you are able to seduce approximately 1 out of every 40 girls you meet, you feel confident, sexy, and worthy. This accomplishment allows you to be your true self, enjoy female companionship guilt-free, and live freely. (This seduction affirmation template works by first defining your end goal + determining how you'd feel once you achieved your goal + identifying why you want your goal).
20. Because you are human, which by definition means you can change, you can improve yourself and become authentically attractive to women. (This is a great girlfriend affirmation if you find yourself perpetually single).
21. Because it's super easy for you to get coffee dates with a significant number of the girls you approach, you know that girls enjoy spending time with you.
22. By studying the right material and taking massive action, you are improving your life and increasing your chances of becoming a sexually attractive man. (A simple yet effective affirmation to be attractive to women.)
23. You're not a hopeless case because you've already seen improvements in your life, such as [insert specific improvements]. 
24. You know you can become charismatic because you know guys who were in worse situations than you and eventually succeeded with women.
25. Because you don't want to look back 3 years from now and regret not taking action, you never stop talking to girls.
26. Because you're constantly facing your fears, you'll have an above-average level of self-confidence in a year.
27. Because you are the kind of person who values real self-transformation and freedom, you take daily action to become an attractive man and you will have a special girlfriend in no time. 
28. Because you are a man who cannot stay average, you know that your life will be transformed in the next 2-5 years. 
29. Every time you look in the mirror, you see a man who has put in the necessary work. It's only a matter of time before you get the life you deserve.
30. People are always noticing and praising your ability to do what makes you happy without the need for others' approval.
31. Because you've changed so much in the past 2 years, you're constantly reminded that you're just getting started and that the fun has only just begun.
32. I love how you don't let your fears control you, but instead push them back by getting your crush to be your girlfriend. 
33. You are so grateful for all the work you have put in over the years and continue to do. You know how hard it can be, but you keep focusing on the rewards.
34. It is wonderful that you are an attractive bad boy with a good sense of style and a charismatic self-confidence that makes it easy for you to get laid. 
35. When other guys have a hard time getting out of their heads, why is it so easy for you to approach girls?
36. When did you stop being a broke, virgin loser and become a cool bad boy to so many girls?
37. You know you are capable of finding a woman no matter how unattractive you are because we are all human, which means we can work to mold ourselves into the people we want to be.

We're still not done, but are you enjoying this massive guide? Comment below and share the love! It keeps me motivated 😉

51. Audio Affirmations 

The following is the audio version of the previous list of affirmations: 

Credit: play.ht

52. Subliminal Affirmations 

While there are some studies [6, 7] showing that subliminal affirmations may work, I prefer listening to my own affirmations. Either way, here’s a sample audio of my subliminal affirmations:

Subliminal audio affirmations coming soon! Hang tight!

53. Books And Resources On Affirmations

Here’s my list of resources to learn more about affirmations: 

A lot of these books are old enough to be copyright free, so make sure you look for those too.

54. Track The Results Of Your Affirmations

To be sure you’re not mentally masturbating, you need to track your objective and subjective markers you set earlier when discussing Ways To Avoid Vague Affirmations: 

• Number of approaches per month. Per week or day are too specific. Sometimes there are just less girls out. 
• Ratio of approaches to girls stopping and speaking to you.
• Ratio of approaches to number closes. This includes getting her social media. 
• Ratio of numbers to dates.
• Ratio of dates to kiss closes. 
• Ratio of dates to pulling home.
• Ratio of dates/ pulling home to sex.

In terms of subjective markers, you can compare yourself to a masculine role model, but here are some other potential trackers:

• Relative anxiety you’re feeling while talking to a girl 1-10
• How many dating books have you read over the past 3 months 
• How many good daygame sessions you’ve been having

You should be seeing results after 3-6 months. If you’re not seeing anything, don’t worry, I’ll be teaching you how to troubleshoot your affirmations in a minute. 

55. Adapt Your Affirmations

As you manifest and your life improves, don’t forget to continuously adapt your affirmations to your new and improved goals. 

56. Why Aren’t My Attraction Affirmations Working

Below is a helpful troubleshooting checklist to revisit when you feel like your affirmations aren’t working like they should be:

See something you’re missing? Look over this guide, find the piece you missed and reimplement. 

57. A Warning About Affirmations 

As we've quoted from earlier studies: Self-help/positive-thinking books are not all fun and games. Done the wrong way, and you've lowered your self-esteem. 

But it doesn't stop there. 

I know too many people who blindly believe in the miraculous manifesting power of affirmations and end up watching the best years of their lives pass them by!

Don't be fooled. Yes, affirmations are powerful, but only action will make your dreams come true.

58. Free PDF Affirmations Worksheet

In the worksheet you have a complete copy of the 9 core questions, a list of all my affirmations, and all the diagrams used throughout the article.

Ending

I'd like to end our time together by saying: In the course of researching this article and putting it all together, I've decided to take affirmations more seriously myself. 

We are in this together. 

And by the way, while we've been using the Law of Attraction for love, you can copy our guidelines and apply them to any other area of your life; money, muscles or spirituality!

Anyway, thanks for joining the team and be sure to share the love in the comments,

Coach Colt 

P.S. check out my other best (10,000+ word) articles! 

1. The Guide: 74 Methods To Tease A Girl [& Learn Cock-Funny]
2. In-Depth Guide: 29 Steps to be the Bad Boy
3. How to Touch a Girl: 47 Smooth Techniques [Pictures Included]