Welcome to the ultimate guide to complimenting girls. No shortcuts were taken to put this guide together. You are reading my very best. Welcome to DatingArmory!
1. What this guide will and will not cover
Let’s be clear about what you can expect from this article:
- Learning all the best things to compliment a girl on.
- Timing. Best times to compliment a girl.
- How to combine escalation methods to achieve maximum effect.
- The 4 different types of compliments.
- How compliments change as you get your girl closer to sleeping with you.
- How to add compliments to your seduction armory and execute them properly.
What you cannot expect:
- 100’s of examples. For that read 215 Compliments for a Girl (Dress, Picture, Eyes, Lips, Hair)
- Real world video or audio examples (may add in later update)
- Thinking that this guide to complimenting girls will teach you how to talk to girls. (Don’t get me wrong, you’ll learn a lot, but don’t complain when I don’t go through all the steps to start a full fledged conversation from a simple compliment.)
Now that you know what to realistically expect from this guide, let’s move onto the basic guidelines to complimenting girls. (if that bores you, skip HERE.)
2. Things to compliment a girl on
Let’s go through my list of possible things to compliment a girl on from the moment you meet her till she’s in your bed:
- Hair (length, shininess)
- Lips (color, fullness)
- Dress (colorful, happy energy)
- Her tan
- Her smile
- Her all around outfit
- Her choice of style
- Her femininity (modesty, submissiveness)
- Her feminine passions (arts, dancing, etc.)
- Her hands (nail polish, softness, bracelet, etc.)
- Her footwear
- How she walks
- Her tattoos
- Her boobs/ ass (best done indirectly, will be discussed in detail)
Remembering this list will help jog your memory when you’re talking to a super hot girl and your brain freezes on you (it happens to all of us).
3. Different types of compliments
There are 4 different kinds of compliments, each one has its place. Let’s discuss.
#1 The Escalating Compliment
This is the most common type. The Escalating Compliment covers the initial opener compliment where you’re telling her that you like her to compliments where you’re commenting on her fantastic body to get her horny.
Both share the same goals: conveying your desire for her with the intention of sexually escalating. Critical to learn early on. Shows a level of confidence most guys don’t have.
#2 The Reward Compliment
The Reward Compliment is delivered when your girlfriend behaves well, acts submissive and doesn’t cause too much drama. (After all, genuine social rewards are always better than monetary ones.) [1, 2]
She gives you a hard time. You ignore her, start checking out other girls (AKA dread game).
She gives you a blowjob. You shower her with a reward compliment. She has earned your attention.
The Reward Compliment isn’t so much about what you say, but when you say it. Additionally, The Reward Compliment can’t be used if you aren’t in a relationship where reward/ punishment boundaries have been set.
#3 The Teasing Compliment
The goal of The Teasing Compliment is to playfully push her away to prevent friendly comfort from taking over the conversation. This is the polar opposite of The Escalating Compliment which is designed to pull her in by conveying she’s attractive and you want her.
To further understand this distinction, read through my guide to teasing girls: The Guide: 74 Methods To Tease A Girl [& Learn Cock-Funny]
#4 The Qualifying Compliment
Lastly, we have The Qualifying Compliment. Here we are complimenting a girl in a way to get her to qualify herself to you, i.e. prove to you that she’s a worthy sexual partner for you.
In a very approving tone, say: I really like how you got dressed up for the date. She will then go on to explain how she chose her outfit and why she thought you’d like it.
It’s the bread and butter of flipping the script and getting a girl to chase you.
It goes without saying that each of these types of compliments deserve their own set of calibrated body language and timing.
4. When to compliment a girl
Here’s the basic timeline to complimenting a girl:
- The moment you meet her
- In middle of the conversation to spike up the boring talk
- Before you take her number
- Before you ask her out on the date
- When you meet up with her on the way to the first date venue
- Before you go for the kiss
- Before you take her home
- As foreplay/ during sex
- Once she’s your girlfriend
Each of these points in the timeline will be explained in detail throughout this guide.
5. Show your desire in each compliment
Don’t give her a neutral, friend-like compliment. Don’t hide that you like her. Don’t hide your dick! 
Every girl knows what you want from her the moment you look at her. Be honest and she’ll respect you for that even if she ultimately rejects you. Plus, if you don’t do it face to face, you’ll have to tell her that you like her over text and at that point you’re just begging to be in the friend zone.
(There are exceptions to this rule, more details here: Step-by-Step: 25 Un-Awkward Ways to Tell a Girl You Like Her.)
6. Slow down how quickly you’re complimenting
This mistake plagues guys who are just starting out: they talk way too quickly to girls and come off as lacking confidence and social calibration.
If that sounds like you, here’s what I recommend:
- Read: 48 Proven Methods To Talk More Clearly, Confidently And Slowly [+ Sound More Masculine]
- Record each interaction you have (not just with girls) and review where you started to mumble and speak too quickly
- Use this app to set random reminders on your phone to talk slowly
It may seem very like an impossible habit to change initially, but with time and consistent effort you’ll overcome it and begin complimenting girls in a slow, masculine voice.
7. Avoid neediness in your compliment
This is a big one, because by definition a compliment is needy; you’re flattering her to get her to like you. And as we all know, neediness is creepy. So how do you compliment a girl without being creepy? Here’s how:
- Talk slowly and confidently as mentioned above
- Show desire in your eyes and no desire to gain her approval
- Do not use more than a couple compliments in each conversation. Not every little accomplishment deserves your praises.
- When complimenting a girl on Snapchat/ Instagram/ Tinder do not go around mentioning all the details on her photo as if you can’t get enough of her
- Don’t gush and repeat the same compliment.
- Include teasing throughout the conversation to keep her at bay (discussed below)
I go into more detail here: How You Can Stop Being Needy In 9 Little Known Ways
8. Tease her with each compliment
As mentioned, teasing is the great way to avoid being seen as needy. Balancing with push/pull, classic coquette behaviour. But how do you pull it off?
The simplest method is to give her 1 or 2 compliments, then end with a playful accusation. Example:
I love your dress and the matching handbag, but what with your smile. You seem suspiciously happy. Is there something for me to be worried about?
I get into much greater detail here: The Guide: 74 Methods To Tease A Girl [& Learn Cock-Funny].
9. Give her your compliment from a good place
Don’t go out to meet women after a 10 hour shift of mindless work which makes you question your existence.
First, head home. Shit, shower, shave. Do you feel more attractive? Not yet? OK, head to the gym, lift heavy weights. Better now? Great, now you’re ready to warm up: go ask for some basic directions from 5 girls. Do it. I know you're scared, but you gotta do it anyway!
Once you get in that positive, confident state which allows you to compliment girls from a place of abundance, you’re ready to make some real approaches. Let’s get started:
10. Keep your initial compliment simple
The key for the initial opener compliment when you first approach the girl is the to keep it simple:
Hi, I know this is totally random, but I saw you from across the street and I had to come tell you that you look nice.
We keep this initial compliment simple because you don’t want to appear needy: you don’t know who she is, she doesn’t know who you are, just what business do you have gushing over her with compliments? Keep it simple, stupid.
- Don’t try to compliment her eyes at this point (will be discussed in the “date” section of this guide)
- If this your initial opener compliment as your attempt to flirt at work, you’ll want to water it down even more to keep that plausible deniability
- Do not progress with more compliments without signs that she’s into you
However, just because your first compliment is simple verbally, your body language and vibe must be ON. She must be able to see in your eyes that you want her… and not as a friend.
11. The Compliment-Appreciation Technique
The Compliment-Appreciation Technique is used to solve 2 problems:
- How do you continue the conversation after your initial compliment?
- How do you make sure she knows that you like her?
So what is The Compliment-Appreciation Technique? You simply notice, or appreciate the work she’s put in to look the way she does.
Let’s work with the earlier example:
Hi, I know this is totally random, but I saw you from across the street and I had to come tell you that you look nice… I can tell you purposefully matched your red jacket with your suede boots and I like it...
Now you’ve used an indirect compliment (because you’re just noticing/ appreciating her look/style) to show your interest in a socially calibrated fashion while still starting up the conversation (because now she’s gonna talk about how she decided on her outfit).
What’s important to point out is that The Compliment-Appreciation Technique isn’t limited to the initial approach or even mid-conversation. You can use it anytime you like, mid-date is fine.
It’s another weapon in your Dating Armory….
What differentiates Stacking to The Compliment-Appreciation Technique?
For those who’ve read the classic pickup artist books know of a technique called Stacking. Stacking is where you make multiple assumptions about her until one of them ‘sticks’ and you can start talking about that topic. Here’s an example:
What I noticed about you was your 173 KG worth of textbooks you’re carrying and your huge laptop. Let me guess, you must be a bodybuilding champion/ you must be a teacher.
After making this assumption about her (either the ridiculous body building one or the more normal teacher assumption), she’s gonna start talking about what she does in life, i.e. you’ve just started a conversation.
So, you may be asking, isn’t The Compliment-Appreciation Technique the same as Stacking? And the answer, well, is NO.
While they share the same purpose of keeping the conversation moving, The Compliment-Appreciation Technique is more geared towards pulling her in, showing that you like her, while Stacking usually pushes her away in a teasing fashion.
Use your social calibration to choose which one fits best in each conversation/ set.
12. Don’t over-shorten your compliments
By now you should be having a conversation about work, life, hobbies, etc. Excellent! But there’s still a need to make your romantic intentions clear, so you can’t stop with your compliments now.
However, what changes is that now (mid-conversation and later), you can and should be taking your time with each compliment.
If you want to compliment her hair, talk about her hair. Don’t rush out a 5 word sentence. Here’s a quote from my article 215 Compliments for a Girl (Dress, Picture, Eyes, Lips, Hair):
Well now I can’t tell the difference between you and Scarlett Johansson. It’s because of your hair. I love how your hair is so long and how you flick it around. You must be the hottest brunette I’ve ever seen, how does your hair look so perfect?
To be fair, this is overkill, but it’s to make a point: don’t be afraid to compliment girls. If you’re gonna go for it, do it right. (As always, I recommend you end with a tease, but that’s not the point here.)
13. Compliment her personality
When complimenting a girl on her personality (and not her boobs), you’re easing off the escalation pedal and moving into the comfort stage (which has its place and is part of the seduction process).
So how does this play out? First, you gotta identify her personality:
- Introvert vs extrovert
- Giggly vs more serious
- Rebel vs good girl
- Caring vs uncaring
- Logical vs emotional (just kidding, all girls are emotional 😉
- Peacekeeper vs disagreeable
- Optimist vs pessimist
Check out these photos as an example:
OK, you don’t gotta be her psychologist to figure her out. Just come up with something and use it to compliment her.
This ability to figure out her personality early on is super important for a ton of reasons which ultimately boil down to these 2 reasons: A) To personally tailor your seduction process to her, B) To tease her about her personality trait.
14. Tell her that she looks like a famous celebrity
I alluded to this one earlier with the overkill hair compliment:
Well now I can’t tell the difference between you and Scarlett Johansson. It’s because of your hair. I love how your hair is so long and how you flick it around. You must be the hottest brunette I’ve ever seen, how does your hair look so perfect?
Comparing girls to hot, famous celebrities - because she’s gotta know which girl you’re talking about) - is great because then she gets to use her own imagination to imagine what you really think of her.
And if you know one thing about girls, it’s this: their imaginations take them to fantasy land... so they may as well be imagining about you.
For more pictures and examples, consult the following guide: 11 Loving Ways to Tell a Girl She's Beautiful, Pretty and Looks Good [With 33+ Examples]
15. Compliment her cute giggle
Another moment you get to sneak in a compliment is when she very cutely giggles at your jokes - I am not saying you have a sense of humor BTW - I’m just saying that a girl who really likes you will laugh at even your stupid jokes… and when she does, and giggles like a cute girl, tell her how adorable she is. You can compliment a girl's smile the same way.
16. Be authentic in your compliment
Honestly, who cares about being authentic if your ‘line’ helps you get laid?
Well, that’s not the point. Girls can tell if you just pulled that compliment out of your ass or off a spreadsheet of 99 compliments. (You’ll get this same feeling from a friend who just started to learn self-help and is acting all strange around you.)
But being authentic in the normal sense isn’t even what I’m referring to here. I’m referring to finding that one thing about her that really turns you on - and telling her about that one thing is how you compliment her.
17. How to finish off your compliment
If you don’t learn to finish your compliments properly, you’ll be left with some pretty deadly awkward silence. So here’s the four core ways I continue the conversation after the compliment:
Leave a vacuum
You can actually do this. Continue mentioning things about her then pause until she speaks up. However, notice that this requires a degree of investment on her part which means I can’t recommend you try this any earlier than on your first date.
Finish off your compliment with a question
I love your hair, it’s so shiny and full. What is your hair routine? (Or some version of that.)
Finish off your compliment with a tease
This is my preferred method because it balances out the push and pull as mentioned previously.
I love your hair, it’s so shiny and full. But what the hell happened here!?
Of course, this must be delivered with a cocky smile and a playful tone. But you can learn more about that in my Ultimate Guide to Teasing Girls.
Finish off your compliment with an assumption
While there are many kinds of assumptions (namely, the teasing assumption), we’ll be referring to the normal, most used type:
I love your hair, it’s so shiny and full. You must know a lot about hair treatment and hairstyles!
Ask her her number
Lastly, you can always finish off your compliment with a request. Now I say asking for her number, but it can be a date request if you’ve complimented her over text.
I love your hair, it’s so shiny and full. Are you open Monday at 7pm? [the proceed to confirm the date + meeting point]
More info on this circumstance here: How To Ask A Girl Out Over Text
18. The Overflow-Compliment Technique
This can be used anytime, but I feel it works best when you meet up with her on your way to the first venue. It’s a great way to semi-neutrally comment on the way she’s dressed while not trying to hide that you want her.
Ok, but wait, what is The Overflow-Compliment Technique?
Quite simple, actually. You compliment her by saying how one aspect of her look overflows to make her look more beautiful as a whole.
So going back to our example of meeting her on the way to the first date venue:
I love your red scarf, it really puts your whole look together as a cute “strawberry” girl.
In my articles about complimenting a girl's dress and picture, I talk about The Overflow-Compliment Technique in detail.
19. Compliment her weak spots
Guy’s who’ve read The Art of Seduction/ 48 Laws of Power (or any other dark triad/ machiavellian material) won’t need me to mention this dirty trick:
Boost her ego, not by confirming what she knows is already beautiful, but by what she fears is ugly and unlikable. The aspect of her (looks, personality, etc.) that she feels vulnerable about.
It sounds nice, but how does it work in practice?
A couple of days ago, you approached this stunning girl who was working out beside you at the gym. She has a massive set of boobs and a fit body. You want to give her a compliment at the start of your date to keep your intentions clear and sexually escalate. [4, 5]
What do you do?
You don't mention anything about her tits even if it’s appropriate. In fact, try to seem unimpressed. Mention that you’ve been with a lot of girls with big jugs.
But then start to dig around. Talk to her about things she’s actually vulnerable about:
Is it her weird laugh?
Is it her boring conversations?
Compliment those things and watch her (ego) glow.
The best part about this is that it works for everyone: super hot models, athletes, billionaires, you and me! We all have things that our ego isn’t so happy about.
20. The Indirect-Compliment Technique
The Indirect-Compliment Technique is about telling a girl that she makes you feel good (go clean or dirty with this technique).
Here’s an example:
Your outfit is really perfect for this sunny day. Damn, it even makes me feel happier!
Should take too much brain power to apply The Indirect-Compliment Technique to other situations (telling her how she’s making you hard, etc.).
21. Compliment her eyes
As discussed in great length (arguably over-length!) in my guide to complimenting girls' eyes, the biggest reason to compliment a girl's eyes is to generate eye contact (AKA to eye-f*ck her).
Next, timing: don’t compliment her eyes during the approach. Without extreme calibration, you can come off as being super creepy (ask me how I know).
Instead, compliment her during the date, preferably in the first date venue where you’re sitting opposite each other (which makes it easy to look into her eyes unless you have eyes on the side of your head, just sayin’).
So now that we got the basics down, what are some things to talk about, after all, it’s just her set of eyeballs? Well, not quite.
- The color of her eyes
- The makeup around her eyes AKA The Compliment-Appreciation Technique (I don’t know anything about girl makeup, but if you do, why not appreciate the work she’s put in to make her eyes look more attractive)
- Compliment her glasses (sure, it’s not her eyeballs, but who cares? You get eye contact!)
- If she’s already your girlfriend, consider buying her some (*cheap) eye related presents: colored eye contacts, false eyelashes, mascara or a makeup set
- Tell her how her eyes make you feel (The Indirect-Compliment Technique)
I’ll be updating my article about eye-compliments soon, so check back later: How to Compliment a Girl's Eyes In 11 Fail-Proof Ways With 32 Examples
22. Compliment her femininity
Femininity is the key word here. Not her ‘looks’ or ‘personality’ per say, rather her femininity. The things she does or is which make her more feminine, therefore more attractive to you, the masculine.
You’ll know what I mean when you see it, but for now, here’s a list to get your mind rolling:
- She’s modest
- She doesn’t mess around with other guys and reserved all of her ‘lust’ for you (lady in the street, freak in the sheets = what every man wants)
- She lets you know how impressed she is by you and how lucky she is to have you as her BF/ husband
- She has feminine hobbies (let’s start by saying NOT kickboxing or being a tattoo artist)
- She enjoys making you happy
- She wants you to lead and is naturally submissive
- She wants you to protect her
- Her hands and feet are soft and pretty
- She doesn’t use excess makeup
- She has long hair
OK, I could go on and on and you can go on and on by reading 17 ways to attract a man without getting rejected. But the point is this: if there’s something super feminine and girly about you that makes your heart jump a beat, tell her! There’s no reason to reward her for having masculine, unattractive traits.
23. Use mysterious compliments
While most guys will write an eBook about “mysterious compliments” and sell it for $9.99 - I’ll give it to you straight up: you gotta make up some B.S. and deliver it in a confident way. Sometimes, the more ridiculous it is, the more girls gobble it up.
Here’s what I mean:
There’s something about you I can’t quite put my finger on. It’s like you're quietly intense and it’s making me feel something…. [then quickly change subjects]
Does that make ANY sense? No, but it’ll keep her up all night wondering what you meant and if you still like her. (I should write a post about being ‘mysterious’ someday, maybe buying me a coffee will help me type it out… you never know!)
24. Use Metaphorical Compliments
Metaphorical Compliments are very much related to "mysterious compliments," here's what I mean:
- Tell her that her eyes remind you of clear water with a tint of green which makes it all come alive
- Tell her that her personality reminds of a mountain hike you did last year. Hard at the beginning. Begins to soften towards the top, but at the peak, it's just stunning.
You get the idea: compliment her by (vaguely) comparing her to beautiful things (AKA using positive metaphors) to ignite her imagination about what you REALLY mean.
25. Give personal, detailed compliments
Here’s where we get deep into complimenting her looks… the rule here is the more personal and detailed the compliment is - the better (just as personal insults are in the opposite spectrum).
Here’s a checklist to mentally go through when looking for a detailed compliment which fits her personally:
- Sweater/ coat
- Pants/ dress
My recommendation: take a screenshot of this, memorize it so you don’t have to pull this page up during a date!
26. Give sexual compliments
You’re now reaching the end of the first date venue (or you’re already at the second venue) and you need to sexually escalate so that you can take her home with minimum resistance.
So how can you use compliments to aid you with that sexual escalation? Use sexual compliments (...I bet you never saw that coming).
- Purposefully walk slower to get behind her then mention you like seeing her ass sway
- If you’re talking to her outside a venue waiting to get in, back up and look at her legs while thinking out loud “yes, I like what I see”
- Tell her that she’s making you horny
- Give her any compliment about her lips (juicy, fat, kissable, etc.)
- Ignore her for a minute then tell her that you weren’t listening because her boobs were distracting you (a classic Krauser technique, but it can applied to anything)
What’s important here is that you include physical escalation (AKA touching) with your verbal escalation (AKA compliments). You’ll learn about “Combining Escalation Methods” soon.
27. Adjust her physically to fit your compliment
This goes hand in hand while giving sexual compliments and it works just like this: after the compliment, adjust the target to be what you want then finish off with “just right.”
- When you tell her that you like her lips (or whatever), pull her in because you want to get a better look (or kiss her)
- When complimenting her hair, play around with her hair until it’s “just right”
- When talking about her necklace/ bracelet, adjust her jewelry to fit your preference
This is a very masculine and dominant move which is why it works so when paired with a sexual compliment (and good timing, of course).
28. Give dirty compliments
Now she’s in your bed and either you’re making out or she’s giving you head. By now it’s time for some dirty compliments. However that falls into the category of dirty talk, which cannot be covered with significant detail here. Buy me a coffee if you want an article about that.
29. Combining Escalation Methods
Before I finish this guide and deal with a cool way to compliment your girlfriend, I’d like to discuss the topic of Combining Escalation Methods.
So what does this all really mean?
Well as mentioned, compliments can be used to sexually escalate a girl by showing your intentions. However, there are 2 other ways to sexually escalate, namely:
- Physical escalation - touching her
- Vibe escalation - having a sexual vibe and body language
- Verbal escalation - everything we’ve said about compliments
So as the name suggests, you can combine these escalation methods:
- When you say she has soft feminine skin, caress her arm
- When you say her boobs are distracting you, try to close her jacket over her cleavage
- When you tell her that she has nice earring (or other jewelry), touch her ears to emphasize your point
Touching should accompany every compliment (as well as a sexual vibe). I’ve got a whole guide about that too: How to Touch a Girl: 47 Smooth Techniques [Pictures Included]
That’s it boys. Thanks for reading. As always, if you have any other ideas, be sure to share them in the comments.