39 Underused Ways To Make Your Girlfriend Happy That Actually Work

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While these 39 behaviours may not be the most arousing moves, they sure will make your girlfriend happy. 

As you go through this guide, you’ll see a mixture of flashy and mundane tricks, don’t leave any of them out. Sometimes you need to do boring things to cement the relationship.

Good luck.

Example of happy girlfriend

Be hot boyfriend material

Are you the kind of guy that would make her not only happy, but excited to be your boyfriend?

Let’s go through 4 things most guys neglect:


Let’s talk about ambition for a moment.

At your age (90% of my readers are 18-24), girls can’t expect you to be on top of your purpose and be financially independent. 

But what girls absolutely require when looking for a long term partner is ambition. 


Because ambition is your promise to her that if she picks you now, at your low-value state, in the future, you’ll become a high value, successful man.

Does that mean you need to be crazy passionate about money, money and more money? Luckly, no. 

You can be ambitious about any of the following niches and that will have the exact same effect on her hindbrain:

  1. Biking 
  2. Bodybuilding
  3. Ice skating
  4. Rugby
  5. Mountain biking
  6. Surfing
  7. Basketball
  8. Skydiving/ wingsuit flying/ bungy jumping/ base jumping
  9. Mountain climbing and rappelling
  10. Brewing 
  11. Parkour 
  12. Fencing 
  13. Chopping wood
  14. Fixing cars and stuff
  15. Build homes
  16. Martial arts/ MMA
You need to have hobbies like this biking one so that girls will want to be your girlfriend

You need to have hobbies like this biking one as an example so that girls will want to be your girlfriend

You can find more examples of these manly hobbies in my guide to masculinity: 17 exclusive steps to be more masculine | DatingArmory.com 

Taking care of yourself

You know what I mean, the basics:

  1. White teeth
  2. Haircut when you need it - not 2 months late
  3. Fresh breath
  4. Shaving when needed
  5. Trimming your nails and keeping them clean
  6. Wake up at normal times and do things you gotta do
  7. Showering when needed
  8. Using deodorant when needed

You already know this and so do 95% of guys reading my content, however some unfortunate guys just never learnt the basics, so we gotta help them out too, am I right?

Taking care of yourself and getting a nice haircut is essential to making her want to stay your girlfriend

Taking care of yourself and getting a nice haircut is essential to making her want to stay your girlfriend

Read more: I NEED A GIRLFRIEND: What Now? | DatingArmory.com 

Going to the gym

Guy, listen up! Girls like guys with muscles! (Proof: The 9 Biological Reasons Why Girls Like Muscles | DatingArmory.com.)

Being skinny isn’t good enough! 

Does that mean you need to follow a stringent diet and become a professional bodybuilder? Of course not. 3 days a week of heavy lifting is fine for just about any guy. 

Going to gym is essential for any guy to maintaining her boyfriend looks

Going to gym is essential for any guy, plus who knows you may end up approaching a hot girl at the gym!

Dressing well

Dressing well includes

  1. Clean clothing
  2. No holes
  3. Clothing that fit you well

But why not take it a step further? Don’t just dress well, have a look! Dress in a way that separates you from the masses.

While I we don’t have time to talk about this subject here, I suggest you read Devilishly Attractive: 19 Transformative Techniques To Look More Masculine & Tough | DatingArmory.com

Dress well for your girlfriend

Bottom line:

Be a man she’s happy to show off as her boyfriend.


Girls love to cuddle, it makes them feel safe, loved and all those wonderful emotions at once.

And while there are no rules when it comes to cuddling, here are some things you should be doing:

  1. Letting her lean her head your strong chest
  2. Wrapping your arm(s) around her 
  3. Kissing her all over (neck, forehead, arms)
  4. Lightly scratch her head
  5. Run your hands through her head
  6. Caress her arms 

Massage her

Related to cuddling is giving your girlfriend a massage. It’s a great way to physically connect while allowing her to relax - sometimes into a deep sleep.

You can give her the basic shoulder/ back massage by standing behind her while she’s sitting down and that’s fun.

But if you want to take it up a notch, you can start by massaging her feet as she’s lying down and then move into giving a full body massage, just be careful, there’s a good chance she’ll get horny.

Hug her

There are many ways to hug a girl, but I find that the type of hug that brings girls the most joy is the surprise hug, for example:

  1. Hugging her the moment she comes back from works and opens the door
  2. Hugging her softly the moment she wakes up 
  3. Spontaneously hugging her for no other reason than you’re in love with her
girls love hugs so much that they'll hug you at times

Again, if you need more hugging styles and/or techniques, read 14 Examples & Steps to Hug a Girl [With Pictures] | DatingArmory.com.  

Hold her hand

Holding your girlfriend’s hand is one of those things that cements your place as her boyfriend as it shows your love and protection all at the same time.

Let give you a couple times when holding her hand would be a good idea:

  1. It’s a cold time and you want to “warm up her hands with your hands”
  2. You’re crossing the street and you want to safely guide her across the street 
  3. Your sitting beside each other on a date night and you interlock fingers in a romantic way

Lesson of the day:

You should be holding her hand as her boyfriend, even if that means getting over your fears.

If you need more ways of holding a girl's hand, here’s a great article for you: How to Hold a Girl's Hand in 9 Simple Ways | DatingArmory.com

Girls love when their boyfriends hold their hands like so

Give her the lifestyle she wants

A girl will have much higher standards when it comes to settling down (unlike one-night-stands/ casual sex) and won’t want to be your girlfriend unless you can give her the lifestyle she wants.

So what does that mean for you? 

Well the cold hard truth is that if you want to get a hot girl to settle down with you, you better have some money. 

I can already hear some of you saying, “But my parents aren’t rich, I can’t succeed in the financial world!”

Here’s how I always respond: “Says who? Have you done any research? Have you followed any business courses from start to finish?”

If you haven’t even tried, how can you say you can’t earn good money? Now that we’re on the same page, here’s what I recommend: 

Avoid all the risks by watching John Crestani’s free workshop (below) about passive, online income, learn the basics, then decide what you want to do from there. 

Cool? Go check it out now!


Bring her breakfast while she’s in bed

Getting up early to cook her a beautiful breakfast is a romantic gesture like nothing else.

But if that’s too much for you, greeting her with a coffee - or her favorite morning drink - is just as loving because you’re showing her how much you think of her.

Bring girlfriend breakfast while she’s in bed

Give her Small, Surprising, Personalized Gifts (S.S.P.G.)

What are Small, Surprising Personalized Gifts (hereafter, SSPG)?

Sorry to be so simple and unmysterious, but SSPG’s are exactly what they stand for: small, surprising, personalized gifts!

Now let’s talk about why. Why are SSPG’s so important? 

Several benefits:

  1. It tells you about what kind of girl she is: can she be happy with a 3 dollar present or does she need a 10,000 dollar cruise around the world? Now you know if she’s a keeper or not… 
  2. It shows her that even though you may be not be able to afford big presents, you’re heart is still there by giving her SSPG’s
  3. Because these are small presents, i.e. cheap, you can give them often which means it’s an easy to show her that you’re thinking about her on a daily basis
  4. SSPG’s are a great way to surprise your girlfriend and we all know how much girls love being positively surprised
  5. If you give her SSPG around her friends and co-workers, they’ll be jealous of her having such a nice boyfriend which will make her heart jump with joy
  6. SSPG’s can also be a great way to tease your girl, depending on the type of naughty present you give her 
  7. SSPG’s are by definition personalized to what she likes, so by giving her an SSPG, you’re showing her how much you care about her preferences 

Examples of SSPG’s

  1. Flowers
  2. Buying her a teddy bear/ stuffed animal because “it made you think of her”
  3. Nice scarf
  4. Fake/used jewelry that happen to have her initials 
  5. Cute dress that you think would look good on her (make sure you tell her why you chose it for her and how you think it compliments her)
  6. Box of chocolates 
  7. Oversized wearable blanket (use it to cuddle with her)
  8. Frozen yogurt of ice cream (make sure it’s her favorite flavour)

If you need some more ideas of what girls like, read: What Do Women Want: 17 Things Girls Like | DatingArmory.com

Invite her out on a Surprising, Romantic Date Night (S.R.D.N.)

If you want to learn the number one way to surprise your girlfriend, SRDN is it.

It's the combination of the surprising, romantic and night elements that makes this technique so powerful, so let's talk about it:

  1. You need a good night date idea. For that, read: What to do on a Date: 49 Creative Things to do | DatingArmory.com (at the end of that article I have a section all about date nights)
  2. Know when she’ll be available in the evening and have the next morning off from work. This is so that she won’t want to end the date night to get enough sleep.
  3. When she least expects it, even last minute, take her out to your planned venue (even with her not knowing where you’re heading). 
  4. In house dates are fine too, but you’ll probably want to do some cleaning first and it’ll be more difficult to keep it a secret
  5. Do romantic things: sharing food from the same plate, cooking her dinner, serving her, lots of kissing; you know the schpiel 
  6. Watch a romantic movie, examples: The Notebook, Casablanca, When Harry Met Sally, and so on

Take care of her after a hard day

If you’ve read The Guide to Masculinity, you’d know that part of being masculine is being the provider. And so with this technique, you get to display that side of your masculinity, here’s how:

  1. Wait for a day where you know she’s had a particularly hard day at work or school (mentally or physically). 
  2. Take a couple of hours before she arrives home and prepare: a nice bath with scented candles, warm towels, a light meal, tea, etc.
  3. Welcome her home with a big smile and hug, then help her unpack and show her how you got her everything she needs

I guess you could call this the best method to make your girlfriend happy again after a hard day.

Watching an emotional, romantic movie 

You wanna know the easiest way to make your girlfriend cry happy tears? Watch an emotional, romantic movie together and let her cry on your shoulder (bonus points if you show your emotional/ vulnerable side too).

Read more: 55 Tried-and-True Steps to Get a Girlfriend at Middle, High School and College | datingarmory.com 

Appreciate her 

Appreciate the small things she does for you.

Forgive her

Making your girlfriend happy after a fight is all about forgiveness. Showing her that you’re not butthurt, you just had an accidental ego-flaring moment and it won’t happen again.

Let her talk about her life

Another basic ‘social skill’ if you may. When she talks about her life’s passions, problems or whatever else, just listen. Don’t do what your ‘man-brain’ defaults to - trying to fix her issues, instead learn to listen and empathize. Don't suggest solutions unless she explicitly asks for them.

Tell her that you’re thinking about her

The first thing you need to know about telling a girl you’re thinking about her is that although it’s cute, it has the deadly potential of making you seem needy, like you don’t have a life outside of the relationship. 

Am I saying to avoid this method altogether? No, however, play it safe and here are some ways to do that:

  1. A simple “how’s your day going” text
  2. Tell her that you had a dream about her (then teasingly tell her that you can’t tell her your dream because you really shouldn’t be thinking about this way)
  3. Hide notes with sweet messages around the house (you can even hide a note in one of her socks)
  4. Covertly send her a love note at work through her female co-workers (they’ll all be jealous of your girlfriend for having a man like you)
  5. Take a picture of a food that she would like to eat and text her it saying: "I can't believe you're just going to let me eat this without you ;)" [1]
  6. Use this technique to make your girlfriend happy in the morning by sending her a simple “good morning text”
  7. Ask her if she’s heard of ___ song. Then mention that the song reminded you of her. You can bet your ass, she’ll run off listening to that song trying to figure out what the song has to do with you

Tell her that you love her 

There are many risks, benefits and nuances to telling a girl that you like her. So, to get the full instruction-set, you’ll need to read the following 2 articles:

  1. 12 Creative Ways to Tell a Girl You Like Her Over Text [With Examples] | DatingArmory.com
  2. How To Tell a GIRL You LIKE Her In 10 Hot Ways | DatingArmory.com

Here’s the TL;DR..

  1. Tell her that you love her because she’s kind to others (janitors, waiters, etc.)
  2. Tell her that you love her craziness
  3. Leave notes around your place that you love and appreciate her

Affirm your love for her the right way and she’ll be yours forever.

Tell her that her ticks are cute

Most girls feel weird about their ticks. By telling your girlfriend that you think her ticks are cute, you are not only helping her accept her own ticks, but also letting her know how much attention you give her.

Here’s a list of ticks you may catch your girlfriend doing which will then give you the opportunity to call them cute:

  1. Repeating words twice in a row, e.g. “Yeah, Yeah”
  2. Wiggling toes when reading something interesting
  3. ‘Strong blinking’ at random moments where she really shuts her eyes
  4. Struggling her head randomly mid conversation

You can find more examples here: 8 solid methods to tell a girl she's cute with examples

Get along with her family and friends

Girls are extremely sensitive to what other people think of them, especially their family and friends. 

If she believes that her family or friends will look down on her because of her relationship with you then expect her to be afraid to commit and be your girlfriend. 

On the other hand, if her parents love having you over and her friends are secretly jealous of you, she’ll have no problem being your happy girlfriend.

So what does that mean for you? Get along with her family and friends even if they drive you up the wall.

Compliment her 

Compliments are what make relationships work, but if done incorrectly, can make you seem needy and ruin an otherwise beautiful relationship. Practice, but more importantly read:

  1. Best 100 Compliments For a GIRLFRIEND | DatingArmory.com 
  2. How to Compliment a Girl's Eyes In 11 Fail-Proof Ways With 32 Examples [NEW]
  3. 11 Loving Ways to Tell a Girl She's Beautiful, Pretty and Looks Good [With 33+ Examples]  

Let’s move on!

Read her a story

How do I say this… girls fucking love story tellers! Girls love entering your imaginary, fantasy world. So if you don’t know stories or don’t know how to deliver them, get learning. It’ll pay off like you can’t believe.

Make her orgasm

Giving her a mindblowing orgasm will make her crazy about keeping you as her boyfriend... as proven in the diagram below:

Giving her a mindblowing orgasm will make her crazy about keeping you as her boyfriend

But seriously, according to several studies, only 18% of women can have an orgasm from penis-in-vagina penetration alone. 

So chances are, to make your girlfriend happy in bed, you’ll need to try some of the following:

  1. Lots and lots of foreplay (kissing, caress, etc.)
  2. Tease her sexually (kissing around her vagina, rubbing your dick across her clit)
  3. Give her passionate oral, don’t just expect a blowjob. Watch: Famous Male Pornstar Exposes Female Ejaculation Trick
  4. Stimulate her boobs
  5. Let her ride you so that she can move her body in the way that stimulates her most
  6. Use sex toys. Yes, sex toys are so underused because most guys are ashamed to use them. Don’t be afraid. Which one do I recommend? Nora: The Original Bluetooth Rabbit Vibrator by Lovense (See below)

Set up a bath for her

Preparing a nice, warm bath is the best way to make your girlfriend happy during her period. Try it - I guarantee she’ll love it.

The Candy tease 

But a candy? Candy isn’t even a Small, Surprising, Personalized Gift?

This is because you aren’t trying to win her over with a candy. Instead, you’re teasing her with it:

Come here little girl, I know you can’t resist it. This candy looks too good, doesn’t it?

The Candy Tease Technique is how you make your girlfriend happy without any money as it doesn’t require any and girls love being teased.

Wrap her up tightly in a blanket

Think of this:

And this:

Now you know what I mean by “wrap her up tightly in a blanket.” 

By the way, once she’s happily wrapped up, you can tease her by not letting her get out, tickling her, etc.

Make her laugh

Girls like guys with a good sense of humor (included in my list of things women want). 

And while I won’t go into different humor routines, I will quote you a scientific study to explain the biology behind this attraction:

For human males, mating can result in reproduction without further involvement in child rearing. Human female reproduction is substantially costlier due to the demands of pregnancy and weaning. This creates pressure for females to choose a mate who will increase the likelihood of survival of the offspring and will provide more paternal investment. 

And here’s the key:

Therefore, traits in males that are attractive to females are ones most likely to meet those criteria.

The study continues:

One characteristic males might advertise and females might evaluate is humor production. Humor production is defined as the ability to produce humorous communication or actions, and/or to be regarded by others as being witty, funny, or humorous (Thorson & Powell, 1993). Miller (2000, 2001; Kaufman et al., 2008) emphasizes the set of cognitive skills necessary to produce humor, particularly creativity and intelligence. Relying upon sexual signaling theory, Miller (2000) conceives of humor as a sexually selected fitness indicator of the underlying trait of intelligence. Fitness indicators should not be easily counterfeited and should be reliable indicators of the underlying trait (Kaufman et al., 2008; Miller, 2001). Applying the theory of sexual selection to humor, humans prefer a partner with a sense of humor because it signifies good genes, particularly intelligence.

To summarize: 

Girls want guys who have the characteristics that’ll help them with child rearing. Humor is one of them because it’s a sign of creativity, intelligence and good genes.

Tickle her

Why not quote from my article where I’ve already covered this topic: The Guide: 74 Methods To Tease A Girl [& Learn Cock-Funny] | DatingArmory.com 

Before writing this piece I wasn’t aware of the whole NSFW part of tickling so to be clear: I am not referring to that part, I’m talking about the good-old, fun tickling. The type of tickling that you loved as a kid. Do that and she’ll love it.

Play a board game together

Board games! Not Xbox. This is a time to bond and talk about things you’ve been pushing off.

You can play boring board games like:

  1. Risk
  2. Monopoly
  3. Scrabble

Or you can play fast paced board games:

  1. Chess
  2. Connect 4
  3. Unsolved Case files


Play Truth-or-Dare

Here’s an example from my article: 201 Questions for a First Date: Only The Best Questions! | datingarmory.com

#1 Truth or Dare 

Truth: What was your worst kiss?

Dare: Sit in middle of the shopping mall for 1 full minute

#2 Truth or Dare 

Truth: Who was your 2nd grade crush?

Dare: Dance for 30 seconds in public

#3 Truth or Dare 

Truth: What was your most awkward moment with your parents?

Dare: Stare at any stranger for 10 seconds

For more examples, check out the following articles:

  1. 100 Weird [And Unusual] Questions To Ask A Girl | datingarmory.com 
  2. 150 Dirty [And Sexy] Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend 
  3. 50+ Hot Questions To Ask a Girlfriend | DatingArmory.com 

Dance with her

Dance to funky jazz in carefree ways or a slow sensual dance to hot music, just be the one to take the lead.

Examples of jazz:

Examples hot music: 

Dance away!

Kill the spider!

The cockroach

The spider

The rat

While she’s standing on top of the chair screaming for help, man up and calmly take off the bug, and then make sure to tease her about it.

Read more: 55 Tried-and-True Steps to Get a Girlfriend at Middle, High School and College | datingarmory.com 

Nicknames for her

Your girlfriend will love being called your cute nickname for her, it shows your special connection to her:

  1. Peachie
  2. Raven haired (for the brunette girls)
  3. Peanut
  4. Darlet

You find a whole bunch of examples here: What do girls like to be called: 71 things to call a girl 

Playfully feed her food

Picture feeding your baby sister a spoon full of delicious food.

Do the same to with your girlfriend, it’s super flirty, your girlfriend will love it.

Kiss her on the forehead

From a practical standpoint, if your girlfriend is short it may be easiest to kiss her on the forehead:

If she’s really that short it might be easier to kiss her on the forehead and only kiss her on the lips when she’s in bed with you or sitting down.

Additionally, girls can’t get enough of loving forehead kissed:

By the way, every girl loves being kissed on the forehead. It’s one of the best ways to show your love and care and it makes them go crazy for you.

Quotes from my article How to KISS a Short Girl: 19 Proven Methods | DatingArmory.com, give it a read - even if your girlfriend isn’t short, I can promise you that you’ll bump into a short girl sooner than later.

there's nothing that'll make your girlfriend happier than a big forehead kiss

Give yourself space from one another

You’ve done all the basics: romantic dates, showing her your love, etc...

how to make your girlfriend happy examples and list

Now it’s time to talk about the things you won’t normally see on other blogs or instructional YouTube videos, starting with: giving her space outside of the relationship to do things she likes (hobbies, passions) without having to be your girlfriend.

And the same goes for you: have times where you go out with your male friends and have reckless fun without worrying about her.

Not doing this can lead to relationship burnout.

Do something she enjoys doing 

Do something she loves and always wanted to try doing with you. Even if you don’t like it. Try to make it fun. (Just don’t do it if you’ll be depressed for the next week.)

Communicate to her in her love language

In Dr. Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate, he lays out the  five primary love languages that people speak:

  1. Words of affirmation
  2. Quality time
  3. Physical touch
  4. Acts of service
  5. Receiving gifts

Read the book for more info, but for now try finding her love language and use it to make her feel loved.

Ask her what makes her happy

Even after reading this article, you’ll be missing the few things that make your girlfriend happy and that’s because they are deeply personal and you need to ask her “what makes you happy.”

Once she tells you those secret things that make her happy, write them down and make sure you don’t forget them because they will come in handy. 


  1. Her favorite color
  2. Favorite movie
  3. What restaurant she wanted to try
  4. What type of candy she likes
  5. Her favorite drink
  6. Her favorite order at Starbucks
  7. What she loves and hates in her soup

How to make your girlfriend happy when she’s depressed and her mood is off

If she’s seriously depressed, then you need to contact a professional. And if she’s having a negative affect on your mood, you need to make space between you at the very least. 

But what if she’s been in a bad mood lately for whatever reason. How can you make her happy again?

  1. Reaffirm your love for her (using her love language)
  2. Knowing when to back off and give her alone time
  3. Give her bath and wash/ massage her hair with lots of love
  4. Do the housework she usually does (laundy, dishes, etc.), the following video should give you an idea of what I mean:

But what if she’s depressed and you’re in a long-distance relationship. Is there a way to make her happy over text? Yes there is!

  1. Affirm your love as before
  2. Encourage her to take a break from life
  3. Listen to her problems 

If you have more ideas, be sure to share them in comments as always:

How to make your long-distance girlfriend happy on the phone and over text 

Here are some examples of what you could say/text:

  1. You're making me undress you in my mind, stop it!
  2. Hey [her name], thanks so much for coming over. BTW, I loved that dress!
  3. The way you did your make up this morning blew me out of the water! I couldn’t stop looking at your red, hot lips…
  4. I love what you did with your hair today, you must be the cutest girl in the city!
  5. Thanks for wearing that sundress, you know what I like [wink]
  6. Oh’ gosh, you like that movie! We are officially BFF’s
  7. OK, we can kiss, but only if you say please
  8. I know how crazy you feel about me, but tonight’s not the best day for hooking up
  9. You know you’re such a spoiled brat around me and you love it
  10. Remind me that you deserve a spanking when we get home, I know you can’t resist
  11. Tell me when you finish writing your love song about me
  12. If you keep texting me I’ll ruin your innocence
  13. We’ve just met and gushed over me, can you please wait until we go on at least a couple dates?

You can find more examples in this article: 12 Creative Ways to Tell a Girl You Like Her Over Text [With Examples] 

What to say to make your girlfriend happy

Lastly, here’s a list of things to say to make your girlfriend happy:

  1. Talk about your ambitions and what you’re doing to reach your goals
  2. Tell her how adorable she is while scratching her head
  3. Bring her breakfast in bed and tell her how much she deserves it
  4. Tell her things that show your appreciation
  5. Verbally forgive her
  6. Ask her how her day is going
  7. Tell her about a romantic dream you had about her
  8. Tell her that “this” beautiful song reminded you of her
  9. Tell her she’s good girlfriend material because she treats everyone with respect
  10. Give her plenty of compliments
  11. Wrap her up tightly in a blanket and tell her how “eatable” and “delicious” she looks

That’s all for today. Hope you enjoyed,

Colt Smith

  • hey thanks for this awesome post I swear all I’m making all the girls around me happy now!

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    About the author 

    Coach Colt here, the founder of Dating Armory, your go-to source for no-nonsense, practical relationship advice. I'm a bisexual male in a same-sex open relationship and a researcher in sex, love, and relationships with 7+ years of experience. I specialize in helping both men and women navigate the crazy world of dating.

    Don't miss my other guides packed with practical dating advice (no bullshit repeated Platitudes) and tons of real life examples:

    My Top 57 First Date Ideas That Always Work (As a Dating Coach)

    Are Coffee Dates Good? It (Kinda) Depends

    17 Basic Coffee Date Tips (From a Dating Coach)

    How to Get a Gay Boyfriend: 25 Tips That Work